trauma
trauma

trauma

Blog Posts Handling Life
Featured

Knowledge vs Information

People are curious creatures.  We want to know stuff. The quest to know something is so great, that search engines are one of the most valued commodities in the world today.

The Google Search engine has 22,083,870,968 queries per day, that is 255,600 per second.  That is a lot of queries.  What are people searching for?  What are we seeking?

We are bombarded with information.  There are so many venues that provide constant information today, that it takes a conscious effort to reduce our consumption, or to cut ourselves off completely.  Cellphones, computers, podcasts, streaming services, social media, television, radio are competing for our attention.  At the present time, I cannot open my phone without seeing ads. This is before I put my password into my cellphone.  A bit frustrating, yes. 

Not long ago the daily news was delivered via a newspaper, or by radio or on the television twice a day.  The 6 o’clock news or the 10 or 11 o’clock news.  I remember sitting with my Dad as he drank his coffee with cream watching the Evening News.  The news then was curated from journalists.  At one time, I considered a career in journalism.  My Dad would say things like “Don’t take the news too seriously, there are more important things in life.”. 

Today much of which we are receiving is an opinion. It is a based on someone’s interpretation of fact.  What if their interpretation is flawed? TicTok, X, Instagram, and Facebook show quick bits meant to invoke emotional response. There may be entertainment value, if a cute cat picture makes one smile.   There may even be pause for thought.  Our Wounded Women Rising Facebook and Instagram accounts have daily inspirational quotes or thoughts and photos to help promote a positive life experience.

As the volume of information increases, does a person’s knowledge expand?

When one learns something new, for example a new skill, or a new way of thinking; the new information is wired in, by the repetition.  Have you ever driven a standard automobile?  You can receive the information on how to use the clutch and the stick,  the gas and brake pedals, but until you can stop on a hill, without rolling back, you don’t know how to drive a standard.  At the point when you will have mastered the sweet spot, then you know how to drive a standard.  You have confidence in your ability to drive.  That confidence empowers you to get on the highway and go to new places and have new experiences. The confidence in your ability is what drives you. 

What is knowledge?

My mentor Zoran Hochstatter says of PureBioenergy Healing Therapy the knowledge comes from the doing. In his book, 3 Chairs he states, “With the knowledge comes an enormous responsibility. The knowledge grows with practice and the joy of learning, and this leads to more personal growth.”

The information that we are subjected to on a daily basis can be a big distraction from seeking wisdom.  How often to you find yourself doom scrolling? Just mindlessly scrolling through FB or Instagram and how do you feel afterwards?  Time slipped by and what have we gained from it.

“Knowledge is not power. Knowledge is potential power. .Knowledge is trumped every day by execution.” says Tony Robbins 

 Henry W. Wright writes:  “The beginning of all wisdom begins with knowledge. You cannot have wisdom unless you first have knowledge.  You cannot have wisdom if you do not preface it with knowledge. Knowledge apart from wisdom is foolishness.”  From the book,” A More Excellent Way”.

Knowledge is a gift to us, but we must ask for it and seek it.  And upon receiving it, use it. Psalm 119.66 NLT “For wisdom will enter your heart, and knowledge will fill you with joy.”

As we go along in this life, may we gain in knowledge. Let’s share what we learned and remember to treat each other with respect and kindness.  When the opportunity presents itself, walk in nature.  Find the quiet and ask God to give you what you seek. I believe that God will give us both peace and the answers that we are seeking. “Ask and it will be given to you, seek, and you will find; knock and it will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives, and he who seeks finds, and to him who knocks it will be opened. Matthew7.7-8. The Old and the New Testament are filled with verses on knowledge, wisdom and peace.  It’s worth a query.



Blog Posts Healing Practices
Featured

Your Transformation – Mind Moves

Mind moves, mind shift, perspective change or reality re-evaluation. Whatever you call it the principle is to “change your mind”. I change my mind every day. I change my mind about what I’m going to wear. I change my mind about what to have for breakfast, lunch or dinner. I change my mind because I’m a woman – and that’s my prerogative. This kind of mind change is not what I want to talk about today.

I want to talk about what goes on in your mind when you want to make a change in your life. I want to talk about how you move your mind from negative thinking to positive thinking. This kind of mind move is the second phase in transformation.

Think of like this. The old digital alarm clocks had a SET button. You choose the time you want to wake up, scroll through the time until you get it just right and press the SET button. This keeps the time in memory. When that time rolls around, the alarm goes off. In the same way, mind moves shift you from a negative way of thinking to a positive way of thinking. You push the SET button to keep it in memory.

A powerful mind move involves moving from a victim mentality to a mind SET of empowerment. Instead of feeling helpless and at the mercy of external circumstances, you recognize your natural strength and responsibility in shaping your own destiny.

For example, rather than dwelling on past traumas over things that happened to you, you get to reframe the event as an experience that shaped your resilience and ability to overcome adversity. You’re still standing. The fact that you are still standing is testament to your strength and resilience.

Transitioning from a fixed mind SET to a growth mind SET is another important mind move. Rather than believing your abilities and qualities are fixed traits, you get to see challenges as opportunities for growth and learning. This is a growth mind move. You move to embrace setbacks as temporary rather than insurmountable obstacles and approach life with a sense of curiosity. You are open to new experiences.

Many women who have experienced trauma struggle with self-doubt and low self-esteem. A mind move in this area involves cultivating self-confidence and self-belief.

When I learned that it was necessary for me to make this mind move, I panicked. I didn’t think it was possible. I believed that this was the way I was and it could not change. If you think this way or this statement fills you with anxiety, please, take a deep breath, exhale slowly and believe that you can cultivate self-confidence.

Cultivating self-confidence involves challenging negative self-talk and replacing it with affirmations of self-worth and capability. For example, instead of telling myself, “I’m not good enough,” I affirm, “I am worthy of love and respect, and I have the strength to overcome any challenge.” It can seem so simple, yet the result of replacing negative self-talk with positive affirmation is SO PROFOUND.

Positive affirmations provide a counterbalance to negative thoughts. Affirming statements challenge and replace destructive beliefs with more empowering beliefs. Repeating positive affirmations gradually rewires your brain to adopt positive and supportive thought patterns, leading to improved self-esteem and self-worth.

Positive affirmations cultivate self-compassion by offering words of kindness, understanding, and acceptance. By affirming your own worthiness, strength, and resilience, you learn to treat yourself with greater kindness and compassion, nurturing a deeper sense of self-love and acceptance.

Positive affirmations inject hope and optimism into your life reminding you that healing is possible and that better days lie ahead. Declarations such as “I trust in the healing process,” “I believe in my ability to heal,” and “I am deserving of a bright future” instill a sense of hope and possibility. This motivates you to persevere on your journey of recovery.

Fear often holds us back from pursuing our dreams and living life to the fullest. A mind move from fear to courage involves acknowledging the presence of your fear but not letting it dictate your actions.

It means stepping out of our comfort zone and taking a bold leap of faith, even in the face of uncertainty. For example, instead of allowing fear of failure to paralyze you, you get to embrace the unknown and take a calculated risk to pursue your goals and dreams.

Take risks. Try new experiences that stretch your abilities and expand your horizons. It may be scary at first, but the effort will be so worth it.

Finally, a transformative mind move involves shifting from an attitude of scarcity to one of abundance. Instead of viewing life through a lens of lack and limitation, you get to see abundance and possibility all around you.

Abundance is not only financial. If you open your heart and your eyes you will see the abundance in your life. I like to go for a walk in the woods regularly. I see the power of the trees and the wind. I see the beauty of the forest floor. I breathe in the clean air. This to me is abundance. Abundance, for me, is looking into the eyes of my children and grandchildren, being thankful they have been given to me and I feel rich. I can look in my fridge and see that I have enough, even if it’s only enough for today.

This may involve practicing gratitude for what you already have and adopting an abundance mind SET that attracts more positivity and abundance into your life. For example, rather than focusing on what you lack, focus on what you have to be grateful for and trust that your needs will be provided.

I find that writing down the things I am grateful for today is an impactful practice. I am reminded of all things, people, places, and experiences I have had. I see how these have impacted my life and I live with a grateful heart. I can also be grateful for my future and picture what that looks like.

I know a woman named Lena. Lena had always felt like she was merely surviving, navigating her days with a heavy heart and a sense of resignation. Deep within her soul, she longed for something more—a life filled with purpose, joy, and fulfillment.

One day, as Lena sat in her tiny apartment, surrounded by the familiar trappings of her existence, she couldn’t shake the feeling that there had to be more to life than what she was experiencing. She yearned for a change, a transformation that would break the chains of her self-imposed limitations and set her spirit free.

With a flicker of determination, Lena embarked on a journey of self-discovery—a journey that would challenge her beliefs, push her boundaries, and ultimately lead her to profound transformation.

As Lena delved into the depths of her own psyche, she encountered the first hurdle on her path: the victim mindset. This mindset held her captive for a long time.

She realized that she had been allowing her past traumas to define her, casting herself as the helpless victim of circumstances beyond her control. But in that moment of awareness, Lena made a conscious choice to reclaim her power—to rise above her past and embrace her innate strength and resilience.

With each move forward, Lena encountered new challenges that tested her resolve. She faced moments of doubt and uncertainty, grappling with the fear of the unknown that threatened to hold her back. But instead of allowing fear to dictate her actions, Lena summoned the courage within her—the courage to step into the unknown, to trust in her own abilities, and to pursue her dreams with unwavering determination.

Along the way, Lena discovered the transformative power of a growth mindset—a belief in her own potential to learn, grow, and evolve. She realized that setbacks were not roadblocks, but rather opportunities for growth and self-discovery.

With each challenge she encountered, Lena embraced the opportunity to expand her horizons, to push past her comfort zone, and to emerge stronger and more resilient than before.

As Lena journeyed deeper into the heart of her own transformation, she began to see the world through new eyes—an abundance mindset opened her heart to the infinite possibilities that surrounded her. She realized that life was not a zero-sum game, but rather a tapestry of abundance and opportunity, waiting to be woven into the fabric of her own unique story.

In the end, Lena emerged from her journey of transformation not as a mere survivor, but as a beacon of hope and inspiration to all who knew her. She had exceeded her limitations, embraced her true essence, and stepped into a reality filled with joy, purpose, and fulfillment.

Now, you get to choose how your transformation develops.  This is ALL about you. No one can take it away. It is nobody else’s business. Your transformation is NOT selfish. Your transformation is the MOST loving act you can do for yourself. Without loving yourself it is impossible to love anyone else.

By making these mind moves, your get to transform your perspective on life. You get to unlock your full potential. You get to create a reality filled with joy, purpose, and fulfillment. This is your journey of self-discovery and empowerment. This journey begins with changing the way you think and perceive the world around you.

The next blog post in this series is the exploration of the huge impact healing methods can have on your transformation.

Remember that trauma does not define you. You choose how to live your life.  

Healing Practices
Featured

Transformation: Acceptance and Self-compassion

I did something the other day I don’t usually do. I found myself scrolling through social media. One reel hooked me into another, and then another and another and on and on it went.

I know the concept of reels is to hook the viewer into more and more. I got hooked. Then next thing I knew an hour and half went by at the speed of my finger. Can you relate? Has this EVER happened to you?

After I had finished chastising myself on the waste of time, I realized something significant.

I realized a lot of the reels I watched were about transformation. I have to admit I have been doing research on the concept of transformation and engaging in some transformative practices.

Algorithms caught on and filled my feed with reels about transformation. Now, not all reels were about transformation. Some were just plain funny and I laughed ‘til I cried. I love a sense of humour. I can still see the outrageous stuff people do and I chuckle to myself. Hmmmm.

Right. Let’s get back to what I was talking about.

So, was scrolling a waste of time? I’m going out on a limb and saying “NO”.

The fact that I realized what I had been watching was of some value made me a bit giddy. I had held the belief that all social media scrolling was to fill in time waiting for appointments or an avenue to killing off brain cells. I was wrong.

Choke! Choke! Gag!

Yes, I was wrong and I am not afraid to admit it. It isn’t easy but I do admit it.

In that hour and a half, I learned some new things and I cemented in the things I already knew and discovered. And now I get to share what I learned with you.

If you aren’t interested in transforming any area of your life, duck out now. I suspect you’ll be bored.

If you are interested in transforming an area of your life read on. My prayer is that you will be blessed and get excited to begin the process of transforming your life to what YOU want it to be.

To start I think we need to ask the question, “Is transformation really possible?”. I give the answer to this question two thumbs up. YES! It is possible to transform your life.

Think about it. Most movies we watch are about transformations. Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde. The Hulk. Kevin Spacey’s character in The Usual Suspects. Eddie Murphy in The Nutty Professor. The Gremlins. Star Wars and don’t forget about every Marvel movie. I believe I made my point.

So yes, transformation is possible. Transformation is not an easy road. Transformation is definitely worth the time, effort and money you invest in the process. So, where do you begin?

Transformation usually starts with a crisis. You hit rock bottom and find yourself in despair and or depression. You can’t do this anymore. How did you get here? How did you get into this? What just happened? How could he?

I am sure you can relate to at least one of these questions during a crisis in your life. I’m also sure you can add a thousand questions to this list.

I remember thinking during one of my many crises that maybe it was me. “If I could just find a way to change me everything would be okay.” So, I tried to change me, a transformation. I tried to become what I thought he wanted. That didn’t work! It actually made matters worse. I was miserable because I was living against my values, what I believed and who I was. My misery made the whole situation worse. Yes, transformation is not always positive.

I also remember a time when my second marriage was in dire trouble. I tried everything I knew at the time to “fix it”. This went on for a few years. Then one morning I woke up and decided it was not about him anymore. It was not about us anymore. It was about me.

I started my journey to wholeness, strength, confidence, and self-worth.

I engaged in psychotherapy to find my way out of the internal chatter that threatened to bury me. I read books. I found online groups for support. I went to retreats, seminars and workshops. I took part in online challenges. I sought out the thoughts and ideas of leaders in the field of transformation. I studied biographies of people who believed in themselves, went against “the norm” and found themselves, their strengths, and their passions.

Ladies, it has been quite the journey. It has cost me a lot of time, money, tears, anger and joy, mostly joy. This journey continues and I do not want to stop. I have found beauty among the ashes. I have found inner joy. I am happy – most of the time. I am an overcomer. I have even had do-overs!

So, where do you start on your journey of transformation – if you decide to start the challenge?

You have heard the quote by Lao Tzu, “The journey of a thousand miles begins with one step.” This is exactly where to start. You start with the first step.

The first step is your decision to invest in yourself. If there is to be a change in your life, that change starts with you.

I believe you made that decision when you started reading this article or looking online for topics on personal change and transformation. We all long to be like the butterfly who emerges from the cocoon as a beautiful creature.

What do you do when you’ve made that decision? Good question! And bravo for asking it. When you ask a good question, you get a good answer. Your next step is acceptance.

Acceptance begins with acknowledging and confirming your emotions, even the painful ones.

When a woman experiences trauma she can allow herself to feel the depth of her sadness, anger, or fear without judgment. Instead of pushing these emotions away or denying their existence, she can acknowledge them as valid responses to her experiences.

Allow me to tell you a story.

Maya was no stranger to life’s challenges; she has weathered her fair share of storms and emerged stronger each time. Despite her resilience, there was still a heaviness in her heart—a lingering ache from wounds that ran deep.

One day Maya found herself sitting by the riverbank, lost in thought. Memories of past sufferings flooded her mind, threatening to consume her in a sea of sorrow. Tears welled up in her eyes as she struggled to make sense of it all.

In that moment of vulnerability, Maya realized that she had been fighting against herself, resisting the pain that clamored for acknowledgment. With an audible moan, she let go of her defenses and allowed herself to feel—to truly feel—the weight of her emotions. She embraced her sadness, her anger, her fear, like old friends returning home after a long journey.

Maya felt a gentle stirring within her—a flicker of self-compassion igniting in the depths of her soul. She spoke softly to herself, offering words of kindness and understanding, like soothing balm to a wounded heart.

“I forgive you,” she whispered, her voice trembling with emotion. “I forgive you for carrying this burden for so long. You deserve peace, and I will walk beside you every step of the way.”

With each passing day, Maya practiced self-compassion in small but profound ways. She learned to let go of the heavy cloak of self-blame that had weighed her down for years.  Instead, she embraced the lightness of forgiveness and grace. She set boundaries to protect her tender heart. She surrounded herself with love and support.

As the seasons turned and the world bloomed around her, Maya found herself transformed. She was not transformed by the absence of pain, but by the acceptance of it. She had become a beacon of hope for others, living proof to the power of acceptance and self-compassion on the journey of healing.

And so, dear reader, remember Maya’s story as you navigate your own path of transformation. Embrace your pain, your imperfections, with open arms, for it is in acceptance that true healing begins.

This is the beginning of your journey in transformation. Acceptance takes time. Take this opportunity to accept. Give yourself the gift of time to accept yourself as you are, scars and all. Allow yourself to feel your emotions. Don’t run from them. Your emotions are part of you, a beautiful part of you.

Show yourself compassion. This means treating yourself with the same kindness and understanding that you would offer to a friend. Present yourself with words of comfort and reassurance during difficult moments. It’s okay to feel overwhelmed. Remind yourself that you are doing the best you can given your circumstances.

Acceptance also means letting go of self-blame and recognizing that traumatic events are not your fault. A woman who has experienced abuse can release feelings of guilt or shame and understand that she did not deserve what happened to her. Instead of blaming herself for past actions or decisions, she can focus on nurturing herself and begin moving forward.

Self-compassion and acceptance involve embracing your imperfections and recognizing that nobody is perfect. A woman can forgive herself for past mistakes or perceived shortcomings, understanding that they do not define her worth. Instead of striving for unattainable standards of perfection, celebrate your uniqueness and inherent value.

Acceptance includes setting boundaries to protect your emotional well-being and honor your needs. You can assertively communicate your boundaries with others, expressing what is and isn’t acceptable behavior. Prioritize self-care and respect your limits. In this way you show self-compassion and cultivate a sense of empowerment.

When you practice acceptance and self-compassion you develop a deeper sense of self-awareness, resilience, and inner peace. These habits serve as the foundation for healing and growth, allowing you to embrace your true self with love and compassion.

There is more to discover on this journey of transformation. Next week we will uncover mindset shifts that can change your perspective and significantly affect your personal healing journey.

May you always be guided by the gentle whispers of self-compassion, leading you home to the depths of your own beautiful soul.

Personal Practices
Featured

HEARTS DESIRE

The amount of sunshine is decreasing here is the Northern Hemisphere. We are coming into a new season.  The season of winter can affect us in many external ways.  As I write this, I inhale some essential oil of peppermint to keep my focus, and some essential oil of orange to lift my mood and remind me of the joy within. 

The preparation and celebration of Christmas is a part of the winter experience.  I can remember my Mom putting the Christmas wish list up on the wall in our kitchen, in mid-month of November. It was above the cat corner, the area where the cats were fed. It was placed there as a reminder for us children to keep the cat’s dishes clean. Responsibility and reward, but that is a blog for another day.

We could put whatever we wanted on the Wish List.  There were 7 squares and one square had a star on it.  In that square you put what you most wanted or desired. There was not a guarantee that you would get the gift you most desired, but my Mom and Dad assured us, we could write whatever we wanted in that space. I remember excitedly flipping through the Sears catalogue, trying to decide what it is was that I really wanted.

I recall this story for you as we come to the close of the year because it is beneficial to pause, reflect and ask ourselves “What do I really, really want?” In the next few weeks, we will be bombarded with ads, flyers, commercials on Facebook, Instagram, TV, and your phone. It has already started – the attempt to entice us to buy the next big thing. There is nothing wrong with recognizing that the world of commerce depends on people buying stuff.  Yes, companies manufacture, and market many items supplying jobs for many people.

What I am contemplating here is the internal verses the external.  At a time when in many ways we can choose anything, what is it that we want? So often our lives and decisions are based upon what other’s want.  What must we do to please someone else? What is expected of me? If it pleases us to be of service to another, that is great and fulfilling.  If we are doing so out of obligation, societal expectation or with a martyr complex, this is not good for us. It creates a dissonance which affects us at a cellular level.

If you could have anything, what would it be?

You get to choose.  You can choose something that is different from what the culture is telling you is important.  You can choose what is right for you. It takes focus, intention, even meditation to find what it is we are seeking.   You may need to get away from the noise so you can truly ask yourself “What do I desire?” and wait to listen for the answer. The concept of “Ask and you will receive” is a universal truth.  The wisdom and love that exists in your heart, will bring you the answer you seek.

I have even discovered that when I ask for help, or counsel, or advice to make the right decision, it comes and often quite quickly.  The trick is to ask.  We also need to quiet our mind so we can hear the answer.

Let’s do a little mental exercise. 

Find a comfortable place to sit.   Sit on the floor with your legs crossed or in a chair/couch with your feet on the floor. Grab a blanket or cushion so as to be comfortable. Turn off your electronics.  Read this part first, then turn off your electronics.

  • Take a deep breath and exhale.
  • Inhale and exhale being conscious of your breath.
  • Close your eyes.
  • Allow your shoulders to drop down, relaxing your jaw, neck and face.
  • Feel the breath extend to your abdomen.
  • Think of a beautiful space, perhaps a garden or a seaside. 
  • Feel the peace of that environment.
  • Immerse yourself in the beauty of that space.
  • Inhale the scents, feel the breeze, touch the plants, trees, or water.
  • Feel relaxed and peaceful.
  • In a calm voice, ask yourself,  What do I desire?
  • Rest comfortably and wait.

You may get a picture in your mind.  You may get a feeling. You may get a word. It is unique to you and for you.

Breath calmly.

When you are ready, leave your imagined garden or beach.  As you come back to conscious surroundings, remember you can go back to the garden of your mind anytime.  Well, not while you are driving, but whenever you feel you want to experience that peace, calm, and the wisdom that is there.

This is one technique that Rose and I use to calm our minds so we can create our purpose driven work.  Purebioenergy Healing Therapy is used to calm the mind, release pain and tension and heal all levels to create wholeness.  I made the decision to be a Certified Purebioenergy Healing Therapist because what I really, really want is to serve people by helping others and myself heal.  As we heal our internal wounds, we open our hearts to live at our fullest potential.  Rose and I know that by educating, encouraging and elevating those who are struggling to overcome the effects experienced after a traumatic life event serves so many people.  It brings us joy to do so.  It is our heart’s desire.

Go and make your own wish list with many squares and stars on it.   In one of the squares, write your heart’s desire. This is the season to rejoice.

Personal Practices
Featured

AFFIRMATIONS CAN CHANGE YOUR LIFE

Affirmations are short, powerful sentences that can help you overcome negative thoughts and replace them with positive ones. An affirmation is anything we say or think, positive or negative. Our self talk is a cascade of affirmations. Every thought you think and every word you speak is an affirmation. This includes all the negative things we think and say to ourselves. Positive affirmations create love, joy, peace, prosperity, and a sense of well-being for yourself. When affirmations are used thoughtfully and consistently, they are incredibly effective in helping to combat the effects of trauma. To make a change in our life we need to retrain our thinking and speaking into positive patterns. Positive affirmations are the beginning points of change.

It is very easy to concentrate on the negatives in life. The negatives are plentiful. Louise Hay said, “Every complaint is an affirmation of something you think you don’t want in your life. Every time you get angry you are affirming you want more anger in your life. Every time you feel like a victim you are affirming you want to continue to feel like a victim. If you feel like your life does not give you want you want in your life, it is certain you will never have the goodies life gives to others until you change the way you think and talk.” We are not bad people because of the way we talk and think. No one is wrong. We have not been taught how to think and talk.  We have been taught by our parents they way they were taught to think and talk.

It is possible to find the positives and talk to ourselves in positive terms. Talking in a positive manner requires a choice. The choice is to be willing to change your focus, to ignore the negativity that exists and find something positive in every piece of self talk and circumstance we encounter. The choice is to affirm, believe and focus on the good things that float through your mind. What you believe you deserve and what you want can be two very different matters.  It takes effort and determination to change your focus from the negative to the affirmative. Pay attention to your thoughts so you can eliminate the experiences you do not want in your life and create the experiences you desire. It is time for each of us to wake up and begin to consciously create our lives in a way that pleases and support us. 

How Do Affirmations Work?

Affirmations work by re-wiring our brains to focus on the positive rather than the negative. Affirmations help us break free from negative patterns of thinking by teaching our minds to focus more on what we do want rather than what we do not want. Affirmations tell your subconscious that you are taking responsibility and there is something you can do to change. Affirmations create something new in your life. By repeating positive statements aloud (or even just in your head) frequently, we create a new neural pathway in our brains that reinforces these positive thoughts and feelings. This helps us to shift our mindset from one that is dominated by fear and negativity to one that is focused on possibility and growth. Whenever you use an affirmation say it with feeling and meaning.

If you believe that affirmations do not work, you are actually saying you do not know how to use affirmations correctly. You can say things like, “my prosperity is growing” yet think “this is stupid, it does not work.” Which affirmation will win out? If you say your affirmations once a day and complain the rest of the time. Which affirmation will win out? The negative one wins every time. The negative affirmation is part of a long-standing, habitual way of looking at life. It can take a long time for affirmations to work when practiced this way, and probably won’t work at all. People give up and discard the practice as garbage because they did not see results in a short time. In truth, they did not embrace positive affirmations. They allowed negative affirmations to win.

Tips for Incorporating Affirmations into Your Life

The most important tip is to make sure you’re actually using your affirmations regularly! You can incorporate them into your daily life easily with these simple tips:

  1. Write down your affirmations every morning or evening. It’s a great way to start or end your day with something positive. Writing down your affirmations helps you remember them better throughout the day so you can repeat them whenever you need an extra boost of positivity. Put them in your phone. Create a wallpaper or photo show on your phone.
  • Find an affirmation buddy! Having someone else who’s also trying to incorporate affirmations into their life can be really helpful in keeping each other accountable and staying motivated. You can exchange affirmations with each other or even just check in periodically throughout the week to see how it’s going!
  • Put reminders around your house or workspace so you remember to practice your affirmations throughout the day. Post-it notes, sticky tabs, phone reminders, anything you can think of. It doesn’t have to be complicated. Find something that works for you and stick with it!
  • Incorporate music into your practice – create a playlist of songs that make you feel good.  Music has an amazing ability to shift our moods quickly. This is a great way to change your state into a positive frame of mind before starting up with your affirmations for the day!

What Affirmations Should You Use.

The first thing you need to do is determine which area or areas of your life you wish to focus. Once you have made that decision you can find numerous positive affirmations. Write down the ones that ring true with you. Below are some examples. Louise Hay was the Queen of affirmations. Many of the following affirmations were taken from her work, I CAN DO IT. How to Use Affirmations to Change Your Life. Pick and choose the one you will use. If you want some positive affirmations for other areas of your life, send me an email at info@woundedwomenrising.ca. I would be overjoyed to provide what you need.

Begin your affirmation practice with the following declaration:

I allow these affirmations to fill my consciousness knowing they are true for me.

HEALTH

  • I have respect for myself.
  • I accept my body as it is.
  • I love every cell of my body.
  • I make healthy choices.
  • For my own health and well being I am relentlessly positive about everything.
  • I enjoy the foods that are best for my body. I can resist anything if I choose to.
  • I take care of my body.
  • I give my body what it needs on every level.
  • I look forward to a healthy old age.
  • I am constantly discovering new ways to improve my health.
  • Healing happens. My body has what it needs to heal naturally.
  • Perfect health is my divine right. I claim it now.
  • I am grateful for my healthy body.
  • Water is my favorite beverage. I drink lots of water to cleanse my body and mind.
  • Filling my mind with pleasant thoughts is my quickest road to health.

PROSPERITY

  • Everything I need comes to me at the perfect time.
  • I willingly move from poverty thinking to prosperity thinking and my finances reflect this change.
  • I express gratitude for all the good in my life.
  • I deserve all that I desire.
  • Life supplies all my needs in great abundance. I trust life.
  • I am open to the unlimited prosperity that exists everywhere.
  • I am a magnet for money.
  • Wherever it is that I work, I am deeply appreciated and well compensated.
  • Abundance flows freely through me.
  • I pay my bills with love, and I rejoice each time.
  • I deserve the best and I accept the best now.
  • I release all resistance to money, and I allow it to flow joyously into my life.
  • I have all that I need and wealth flows to me in abundance.
  • My prosperity is always increasing.
  • I give thanks for all that I have now and for all of God’s riches.

STRESS FREE LIVING

  • I let go of all fear and doubt.
  • Life is simple and easy for me.
  • I create a stress-free world for myself.
  • I relax all my neck muscles and I let go of all tension in my shoulders.
  • I slowly breathe in and out. I relax more and more with each breath.
  • I am a capable person. I can handle anything that comes my way.
  • I am centered, focused.
  • I feel more secure each day.
  • I express my feelings.
  • I can be serene in any situation.
  • I am comfortable with my finances. I can always pay my bills on time.
  • I trust myself to deal with any problems that arise during the day.
  • I realize that stress is only fear. I now release those fears.
  • I am in the process of positive changes in all areas of my life.
  • My confidence is unshakeable because I live with integrity.

FORGIVENESS

  • The door to my heart opens inwards. I open the door to forgiveness.
  • The world around me changes when I change my thoughts.
  • I am willing to be willing to forgive.
  • The past is over, it has no power now.
  • I refuse to be helpless. I refuse to be a victim. I claim my own power.
  • I give myself the gift of freedom from the past and move with joy into the now.
  • There is no problem too big or too small that it cannot be solved with love.
  • I am ready to be healed. I am willing to forgive. All is well.
  • As I forgive myself it becomes easier to forgive others.
  • I forgive myself for not being perfect.
  • It is safe for me to release all of my childhood traumas and move into love.
  • I forgive everyone from my past for all perceived wrongs. I release them with love.
  • All the changes that lie before me are positive ones and I am safe.
  • I choose to forgive the past and I choose to move into a joyous life.
  • I am living the very best way I know how.

RELATIONSHIPS AND ROMANCE

  • I practice profound self-love.
  • From time to time, I ask those I love, “How can I love you more?”
  • I choose to see clearly with eyes of love. I love what I see.
  • I draw love and romance into my life, and I accept it now.
  • Love is around every corner and joy fills my entire world.
  • I rejoice in the love I encounter every day.
  • I am comfortable looking in the mirror and saying, “I love you. I really really love you.”
  • I deserve love, romance, and joy and all the good life has to offer me.
  • I am surrounded by love. All is well.
  • I am in a joyous, intimate relationship with a person who truly loves me. That person is me.
  • I am beautiful and everybody loves me.
  • I am greeted by love wherever I go.
  • I attract only healthy relationships.
  • I am always treated well.
  • I am very thankful for all the love in my life.
  • I find love everywhere.

SELF-ESTEEM

  • I am totally adequate for all situations.
  • I choose to feel good about myself.
  • I am worthy of my own love.
  • I stand on my own two feet. I accept and use my own power.
  • It is safe for me to speak up for myself.
  • I am loved and accepted exactly as I am right now.
  • My self esteem is high because I honour who I am.
  • My life gets more fabulous each day. I look forward to what each new hour brings.
  • I am neither too little nor too much. I do not have to prove myself to anyone.
  • Life supports me in every possible way.
  • My consciousness is filled with healthy loving thoughts that reflect themselves in my experience.
  • The greatest gift I give myself is unconditional love.
  • I love myself exactly as I am.
  • I am the master of my mind.
  • I am a pure powerful soul.

Today is a new day. Today is the day you begin to create a new joyous life. Today is the day to release all of your limitations. You can change your life for the better. You have the tools within you to create the life you desire. These tools are your thoughts and beliefs. Affirmations are powerful tools for shifting your perspective from one dominated by fear and negativity towards one focused on possibility and growth. With consistent practice, affirmations can help us break patterns of negative thinking and we learn to respond more positively to challenging situations in our lives. I trust this article has given you some practical tips about how to start incorporating affirming statements into your everyday life. Start this new practice and watch how your life will change.

Happy Affirming!

Blog Posts Personal Practices
Featured

I’m So Sorry

Do Not Apologize for Who You Are

When I started delving into the realm of healing from my traumatic past and self development, I noticed that I apologized a lot. I apologized for my feelings, my opinions, my looks, my clothes. I even apologized for other people. For reasons I cannot explain I took responsibility for their thoughts and actions. I was constantly playing catch up with others. I was trying to become what other people wanted me to be. I was driving myself crazy trying to “measure up.” Any time I thought I measured up the bar was moved. The only thing I exceled at was the losing battle.  I did not embrace who I was. I denied me. I denied my own mind. I denied my own heart, my own soul. No wonder my life seemed to be such a mess. I gave my power away.

I figured out that apologizing was identical to agreeing that there was something inherently wrong with me. I have met women who do the same thing. I have met women who have suffered traumatic circumstances in life who do the same thing. We have been told that we aren’t good enough, we are dumb, stupid, and useless. And we apologize. We are so busy surviving that we cannot take the time to make sense of what is being said to us. Our energy is consumed trying to anticipate the next attack and walking on eggshells so another attack will not happen. The life a traumatized woman is lived in fear. And she apologises for that.

Once the traumatized woman is free of the circumstances the apologies do not stop. The apologies do not stop until she has space to breathe and seeks help. I got tired of apologizing. I was sick and tired of apologizing for what I did not do. I was tired of apologizing for who I am. I was tired of apologizing for another person’s behaviour. I sought help. When I sought help, I was told I was an abused woman. I did not identify as one until I saw the ugliness, I lived in.

What does an apology for who you are do to you? Apologizing for who you are kills your soul. That is a very blunt statement. It is truth. When you apologize for who you are you deny your divinity. You deny the truth of who God made you to be. You deny what you know is true about you. You let someone else define who you are. Who you are is not the decision of someone else. Who you are is up to you and only you.

The process of personally defining who you are is not an easy one. I can tell you with 100 percent certainty it is necessary and extremely rewarding. Defining yourself is an act of self love, the divine act of self love. Who better to lavish this love on than yourself? So, let us talk about how to stop apologizing. Some of this you will have read in past posts. I may sound like a broken record. However, I believe, that repetition is the mother of all skill.

KNOW YOUR TRUTH

We are often worried about what other people will think of us. We are fearful that we will not fit in. When we are focused on what other people think of us, we are caught up in someone else’s world. We lose focus on our world. I am not saying that we should only be concerned about our own world and be selfish. Quite the contrary. We live in relationship with others all the time. We need to be concerned with others, however, should we be so concerned with their world and ignore our own? Consider this. What are you not doing to make yourself feel good? Where is your time and energy going? Are you so focused on others you are tired and worn out or burnt out? Whose opinion are you taking into consideration? Why are you making someone else’s opinion greater than your opinion about yourself?

REMEMBER THAT NO ONE IS PERFECT

It is time to stop playing the comparison game. Each and every one of us is unique. So unique in fact that even identical multiple birth children do not have identical DNA. Perfect people are an illusion. Perfect people are only showing you the best of themselves. Remember we all struggle. We all have flaws. We all have dust under our beds and skeletons in the closet. Culture has taught us that it is possible to be perfect. Commercial creators are excellent at showing us what could be if we did the same as so and so or had the same stuff as our neighbour. Cut the noise on that. Embrace your uniqueness. Flaunt it! Celebrate it! Love it!!

YOU ALWAYS HAVE A CHOICE

There is always a choice. Stay true to your convictions and your values. Do not allow ANYONE to tell you what you should be or not be. Do not allow ANYONE to interfere with who you are. Do not waiver because of someone else’s opinion. Be strong. Be confident. Build your confidence. You are a blessed soul, carved by the hand of God.

SURROUND YOURSELF WITH POSITIVE PEOPLE

Who wants to be around those who are negative? Who wants to be around those who constantly find fault? Who wants to be around someone who criticize everything? Who wants to be around people who think others are the cause of all their problems? Being in the presence of positive people affects us. Their positivity and cheerful personalities rub off on us. Being around them brings us joy and warms our hearts. Oh my gosh, give me some of that!

BE KIND TO YOURSELF

Practice self love. When you have made a mistake, own up to it. Apologize for that, not who you are. We all make mistakes. Give yourself a hug, say I love you and do your best to put it behind you. Being kind to yourself allows you to become emotionally flexible. You are equipped to navigate challenging emotions and challenging situations. You are capable of connecting with yourself and others.

PRACTICE POSITIVE SELF TALK

A while back we did a 30 day I AM Challenge on Facebook.  The premise behind the challenge was positive self talk. When we use I AM statements we are rewiring our brains. It is like our brain sits up and takes notice of what comes after the statement I AM. The I AM statements soak down deep into our souls and become our reality.

STOP APOLOGIZING

Only apologize when you own your mistakes. You are a dear wonderful soul as unique as a snowflake. You are who God made you to be. No one, and I mean NO ONE has any right to tell you differently. Embrace your crazy, beautiful, amazing self.

Do you want to do something positive and get around positive people? Vanessa Vance, Judy Johnston and I have planned a Create Your Dream Board workshop. This is an in-person workshop on Tuesday January 24th, 7:00 to 9:00 pm at the office of Exit Realty Genesis office, 2-1373 Victoria St. N., Kitchener, ON, Canada, Ontario. Come out and get creative with other positive people. Lift your spirits. Lift your life. You can send us an email or use this link to register.

There is a nominal fee of $10 per participant for this workshop.

As always, we love your comments. Share your thoughts with us. You help us grow.

Welcome
Featured

Hello World

We are all wounded women at some level. Sometimes the wounds can be seen. Sometimes the wounds of the heart can only be felt but influence us in our thoughts and the way we act daily. True healing comes with a change in the way we think, act and live. Your thoughts become your actions. Your actions become your habits. Your habits become your life. 

Do you find yourself in need of non-judgmental ear? Do you feel life has been unfair to you? Do you believe your pain will never end? Do you second guess your decision? Are you even able to make decisions? Do you feel undermined? When you look to the future, what do you see? Do you feel your sense of loss is so great, it is consuming you? Do you believe you’ve lost your sense of self? Are you in pain? Do you feel like your body has betrayed you?

If you answered yes to even one of these questions, this is the place for you. We envision a tribe of women who have risen out of challenging life altering traumatic experiences. Our mission is to guide women who have experienced traumatic circumstances to heal, rise and thrive. We guide women on the path to avoid the pitfalls, give a boost over the boulders and let you balance yourself so you can walk, skip and sing along the road less travelled.

There is joy to be had. This joy is yours for the asking, for the taking. It belongs to you. You deserve it. You are worthy of it. It is within you. We would love to support you as you uncover your joy.