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Joy, Joy, Unending Joy

Judy Johnston 12/12/2025 12/19/2025

Joy, Joy, Joy, unending Joy.

In this season, we hear a lot about joy. It is in the Christmas songs on playlists, Joy to the World rings out as we negotiate a parking space at the mall. We see the word lit up in lights among the decorations. We are reminded to be joyful by advertisements for alcohol, diamond jewellery, or perfumes. But what is Joy?

Joy supersedes happiness. Happiness is an emotion that can come or go depending on the circumstances surrounding us. It is a good, positive emotion that makes us, well, happy. Joy is deeper, more profound. Joy is a state of being. Joy holds a higher resonance. It embraces a deep delight, gladness, a sense of well-being, a sense of spiritual wellness. Joy is like a deep well that sustains us even in times of trial or drought. Happiness may happen to us. Joy is within us. Jesus tells us to “Ask, and you will receive so that your joy will be complete” JN16.24

Joy can be described as bubbling up, like an eternal spring that exists within our hearts.

I did a quick survey before I wrote this article, and asked people. “What brings you joy?”

These are the answers that I received from different people. Interestingly, many people gave the same answers.

Playing with my grand children, watching children play, listening to children speak or sing.

Listening to music, singing, dancing. Music lifts our mood. Singing a song out loud, really loud. Playing the piano. Playing my drums. Dancing in the kitchen while I make dinner.

Playing with or watching my dog. Petting our cat.

Holding my new baby.

Playing a game with others. Spending time with my friends. Having a deep heart-felt conversation. Getting something accomplished, especially if I had been putting it off.

Sewing. Throwing clay to make pots or mugs. Swimming in the sea. Painting.

Baking a pie, cake, or cookies, and chocolates and gifting them to my friends and family.

The smell of orange, or cinnamon…invokes a memory of baking with my Mom.

Walking in the snow. Walking on the beach. Watching and listening to the birds outside.

Just being with my loved ones. Smiling at people. Saying Thank you. Listening to my spouse. Surprising my child with a gift or an outing.

Read the list again and see what you notice. Most of the joy moments came from being with others, doing for others, or being in nature or feeling close to God. Not one person I interviewed said their joy came from a diamond necklace or a new car or a bottle of Scotch.

The other element I noticed was that so many found joy in giving to others. One person volunteers every year with a charity that provides meals and gifts for people. She said it was the highlight of her Christmas season. Joy comes from a sense of purpose, rooted in relationship with self, God and others. That is what Jesus was talking about.

There used to be a slogan for the Red Cross, saying ‘Blood, it’s in you to Give”. Isn’t it true that joy is also in us to give. In fact the more we give of it, the more we get back. Remembering that joy is deeper than a passing emotion, it is an essential part of you. It exists within you. It is not something to be strived for, it is already there. As you become attuned to resonance of joy, you will see and feel and choose it.

Take some time today or over the next few weeks and uncover, experience and elevate your joy.

Sometimes, I dare say, even often, our joy gets covered over. We may perceive that we are too busy, too stressed, to oppressed, to obsessed, to distracted, too confused, too abused, too sad or lonely to uncover and hold our joy. Those are lies. The truth is your joy never leaves you. It waits patiently for you to remember and come back to it. Your spirit holds it there like a candle lighting your way in the darkness. Joy, Joy, unceasing Joy.

Come in from the cold. Come to the light that waits for you. Pause, breathe.

Remember how loved you are. You are love. Created in the image of love. The eternal love that is never extinguished. Your spirit knows. Rest. Ask and receive.

May joy be with you, within you, and through you. May you sing out loud and let joy fill you with that glorious, magnificent resonance. May the soft stillness of snow falling, or of a sunrise bring a smile to your face and a glow to your being. May peace, joy and love live within you. May your joy increase, and your wonder never cease. May God blessings surround and sustain you.

Handling Life Healing Practices

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If Guilt and Shame Have Been Constant Companions, There Is a Softer Way Forward

Rose 11/20/2025 12/16/2025

If you joined us for this week’s Wisdom Wednesday inside the Wounded Women Rising Facebook group, you already know we went deep into guilt and shame. The kind of deep that makes you pause halfway through the video, stare at the wall, and whisper, “Oh… wow. That’s me.”

And if you’re reading this now, chances are something clicked for you.
A memory.
A pattern.
A familiar knot in your stomach.
A sentence you’ve said a hundred times like, “I know it wasn’t my fault…but I still feel responsible.”

Here’s what I want you to hear right out of the gate:

Awareness is not where the journey ends.
It’s where your power finally begins.

So now that you’ve identified the guilt and shame loop in your life, now that you’ve seen how it operates, where it hides, and how it shows up the next question becomes:

Now what?
How do you actually break free from a pattern you’ve lived with for years… sometimes decades?

Let’s walk through this together, like two friends sitting with warm mugs and honest hearts.

Step 1: Name the Pattern Every Time It Shows Up

This sounds almost too simple but trust me naming the pattern is the beginning of mastery.

The next time you feel guilt wash over you because you said no…
or you didn’t respond fast enough…
or someone else felt disappointed…

pause and ask yourself:

“Is this guilt…or is this conditioning?”

That question alone disrupts the automatic spiral.

You’re teaching your brain:

“We don’t respond on autopilot anymore.”

Here’s what naming it might sound like:

“Ah, this is that old guilt story again.”

“I feel responsible for their emotions, but that’s not mine to carry.”

“This shame isn’t truth, it’s programming.”

You’re not trying to fix anything yet.
You’re simply turning the light on in the room.

Shame thrives in silence.
Guilt thrives in old habits.
Neither survives well in the light of awareness.

Step 2: Interrupt the Loop Before It Takes the Wheel

Once you recognize the pattern, the second step is to interrupt it. Think of this like putting a wedge in a door you’ve decided not to walk through anymore.

Here are a few quick, powerful ways to break the loop in real time:

1. Slow the moment down

Take one slow breath.
Put your hand on your heart.
Give yourself five seconds of choice instead of an immediate reaction.

2. Ask a disrupting question

Try any of these:

“What would I choose here if I wasn’t afraid of being judged?”

“What would I do if guilt wasn’t in the room?”

“What actually belongs to me…and what doesn’t?”

Patterns crack open when you interrupt them before they run the show.

3. Physically shift your body

This might sound strange but trust me – it works.

Stand up.
Move your shoulders.
Change rooms.
Walk for a moment.

Do a little dance??

Interrupting the physical state interrupts the emotional pattern.

Step 3: Choose a New Response. Even if It Feels Uncomfortable

This is the part that makes women say:

“But what if someone gets upset?”
“But what if they think I’m selfish?”
“But what if I’m wrong?”

Deep breath, love.

Growth is uncomfortable.
Choosing differently is uncomfortable.
Letting go of guilt is definitely uncomfortable.

But discomfort is not danger.
It’s simply unfamiliar.

Here’s a truth you may not have been told:

Choosing yourself will feel wrong before it feels right.

Not because it is wrong but because guilt taught you to believe that your needs were optional.

Your “new responses” might feel awkward at first, like:

Saying “No, I can’t do that today.”

Not explaining yourself.

Not apologizing for resting.

Not rushing to fix someone else’s emotional storm.

Ending a conversation that is draining you.

These aren’t selfish choices.
These are self-respecting choices.

Your nervous system will catch up.
Your sense of self will strengthen.
Your confidence will rise.

But it starts with choosing differently in small, consistent moments.

Step 4: Reclaim Your Inner Voice (The One That Shame Silenced)

Let’s be honest. Guilt and shame have a way of drowning out our inner voice.

They whisper things like:

“You should’ve known better.”
“You’re the problem.”
“You need to make up for it.”
“You have to prove you’re good.”

But here’s the question I want you to ask yourself tonight:

“What is the truth I have been too afraid to say out loud?”

Sometimes the truth sounds like:

“I did the best I could.”
“I didn’t deserve what happened.”
“I’m allowed to make choices that protect my peace.”
“I don’t have to carry that anymore.”

Your voice is still in there.
You’re not finding it. You’re remembering it.

And every time you speak from that place, you weaken the shame story.

Step 5: Build New Emotional Pathways (This Is Where Freedom Begins)

Breaking a pattern is not just about stopping something.

It’s about creating something new:

new boundaries
new thoughts
new beliefs
new ways of responding
new self-trust
new emotional safety

Here’s a beautiful truth:

Your brain literally rewires through repetition.

Every time you choose not to apologize for something you didn’t do…
Every time you don’t explain yourself in circles…
Every time you choose rest instead of running…
Every time you let someone be disappointed without rescuing them…

You are building a new identity:

A woman who trusts herself.
A woman who listens to her inner knowing.
A woman who chooses her peace.
A woman who doesn’t shrink to make others comfortable.
A woman who steps out of shame and into her strength.

This is how confidence grows.
One choice at a time.

Step 6: Surround Yourself With People Who Reflect Your Strength, Not Your Guilt

You know this as well as I do:

Healing in isolation is slow.
Healing in community is powerful.

When you surround yourself with other women who are also breaking cycles, choosing themselves, and speaking truth, something shifts inside you:

You realize you’re not dramatic.
You’re not “too much.”
You’re not wrong.
You’re not selfish.

You’re just done shrinking.

If you’re not already in our Wounded Women Rising Facebook group, this is your invitation to step into a circle of women who get it. Women who will encourage you while you rewrite your story.

No one heals guilt and shame alone.
We heal in places where our voices are welcomed, not questioned.

Step 7: Let This Week Be a Starting Point. Not the Whole Story

You’ve spent this week learning what guilt and shame look like.
You’ve seen how they show up in your body and emotions.
You’ve seen how they distort your sense of responsibility.
And you’ve seen how they can keep you stuck.

But here’s the truth that matters most:

Guilt and shame are not your identity.
They are leftover survival strategies and you are no longer surviving.
You are rebuilding.

And rebuilding takes courage.

Courage to see the pattern.
Courage to step out of it.
Courage to choose yourself even when it’s unfamiliar.
Courage to walk into a new chapter with shaky legs and a steady heart.

You’re doing that.
Right now.
By reading this.
By questioning old stories.
By daring to imagine something different.

I’m proud of you.
More than you know.

A final thought, from my heart to yours

Breaking free from guilt and shame won’t happen in one weekend.
It won’t happen because you watched one video or read one blog post.
It happens slowly, gently, consistently.

You break free every time you choose yourself.

And hear this clearly:

You are worthy of peace.
You are worthy of rest.
You are worthy of boundaries.
You are worthy of joy.
You are worthy of your own voice.
And you are worthy of a life that feels like it belongs to you.

This week might have stirred a lot for you.
Let this blog post be the permission slip you’ve needed.

You don’t have to live inside guilt and shame anymore.
You get to walk out of that pattern one brave choice at a time.

I’m right here with you.

Blog Posts Handling Life

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Boundaries – Protecting your Peace, Reclaiming your Power

Judy Johnston 10/31/2025 10/31/2025

A good fence makes great neighbours.

A boundary is an invisible fence that holds our values, security, insights, ideas, time. The walls and doors of your house, keep your body and possessions safe. It prevents your stuff from spilling all over your yard. In the same way, your boundaries protect your mental health, your physical health and your emotional wellbeing.

Why do you need boundaries?

You need boundaries so you have control over what happens in your space. Just like property lines. I can plant flowers or vegetables on my property but I can’t plant them in my neighbour’s yard, especially when they want a yard of manicured green grass. Your boundaries give you control over your space. When someone trespasses on your space without your permission, it causes you pain. And vice versa. You control your space and take responsibility for that space. Your internal space is your thoughts, your talents, your emotions, your habits, your intuition, your spirit, your desires, your goals and dreams. Each of these have a light side and a dark side to them. It is important to take responsibility for all it, the light, and the dark. Only you can control you. Remember though, you can ask for help when you need it. You can offer help to another person. They get to choose if they can help or if they want your help. We cannot thrive in isolation. Often after a traumatic event, people withdraw and go inward, closing off their hearts, sitting in the dark, not wanting to trust or be with others. I understand this response. This can be a starting point.

We are created for community. You do, however get to choose the community. A community that aligns with your values, and that values you. A boundary is not a wall that keeps others out. It is more like a fence, or a cell membrane, or a riverbank. It is permeable with you as the gate keeper. You get to decide who or what comes in, and who or what is not allowed in. What would you like to have in your space? What you value is worth protecting. Your peace of mind is priceless. Your talents and gifts unique to you are needed in the world. Give yourself permission to say yes to what aligns with you, and no to what does not. It is not selfish. It is self-respect. When we start to respect ourselves, others will too. If someone consistently disrespects, oversteps and ignores your boundaries, it is time to limit or end your relationship with this person.

Here is a visual for you. The hula hoop analogy. Imagine you have a hula hoop around you. You are holding it in place with your hands. You can easily move within the hula hoop. You can move your legs and travel with the hula hoop. If others have their hula hoops in place, everyone can participate in the dance, with ease of space. Not banging into each other. Each having the freedom to function within their hoop. Imagine now that your hula hoop is held by another person. It impedes your ability to move freely. If someone puts their hula hoop over you, without your permission or consent, it stops you from moving freely. It is constricting and uncomfortable, especially if it continues for an extended period. The hula hoops represent our boundaries. We can tolerate letting someone influence us if it is for the common good, and usually for a set period, knowing there is a common goal to achieve. If the time exceeds our expectations or if the goal is constantly changing, having our boundaries trampled on, leads to resentment. Boundaries are essential for well-being.

Being nice can often negate our boundaries. I want people to like me therefore I may do things that may not be good for me in order to please them. I over give or let someone take advantage of my niceness. Perhaps you over give your time or your talent, or don’t charge the going rate for your work. Depleting yourself will eventually affect your physical and mental wellbeing and your wallet too.

Signs of Poor Boundaries.

There are specific symptoms that go along with struggling from poor boundaries. Here is a list of some symptoms and the corresponding boundary issue.

Here are 5 health symptoms tied to weak or violated boundaries:

Symptom	What It Means
Chronic Stress & Anxiety	Your nervous system is overloaded from people-pleasing or overcommitting
Burnout & Exhaustion	You’re carrying emotional weight that isn’t yours
Resentment & Irritability	You say “yes” when you want to say “no”
Tension, Headaches, Insomnia	The body stores unspoken emotions
Low Self-Worth or Self-Doubt	You feel guilty for having needs

Many women think something is wrong with them, but truly, they are simply overextended, overwhelmed, and emotionally unprotected.

Boundaries extend to many parts of our lives.

Here’s 5 areas that you might consider reviewing.

Physical Boundaries	You choose how, when, and with whom you share physical space or touch.
Emotional Boundaries	“I’m not available for conversations that are disrespectful.”
Time Boundaries	“I can help, but I only have 30 minutes.”
Energetic Boundaries	Limiting time with people who drain or criticize you. Have you ever felt deep exhaustion after being with certain people? This needs a boundary. Perhaps a quick phone call and not an in-person visit is warranted. Set a timer and end the call with a polite “I will let you go now, Have a great day.”
Digital Boundaries	You don’t have to answer every message immediately. Posts that upset you, delete. Set a time limit to how long you will be on social media. Don’t scroll before bedtime, it interferes with our ability to fall and stay asleep.

Here are some phrases you can use to help you establish and maintain your boundaries. You can be polite, but firm.

Healthy boundaries sound like:

“No, I’m not able to do that today.”
“I need time to think before I commit.”
“I will not be spoken to that way.”
“That doesn’t feel right for me.”

Saying no is not selfish. It is a form of self-respect.
Remember: people who benefit from your lack of boundaries will be the ones who resist them most. There are those people who will not honour your boundaries. For your own health, you must separate yourself from them.

Here is an Example of a Healthy Boundary: “I won’t be available to talk after 9 PM. That’s my time to rest and recharge.”

This boundary is healthy because:

It clearly communicates a limit.
It takes responsibility for personal needs.
It is respectful, firm, and guilt-free.
It protects emotional and physical well-being.

Each person needs their privacy, their own space to collect their thoughts, and to have a clean, quiet space.

Your boundaries and your values are woven together. If you have a value of generosity, you may delight in assisting others, financially, with your time, or your talent. Remember that even in giving, you need to receive. You also need discernment, so your generosity is not taken for granted. You do not want to feel pressured that you must give, even when you cannot. This is your boundary.

In nature, even the individual cells of our body have a boundary. It is the cell membrane on every cell in our body. It protects our energy and our ability to renew it. Our cell membrane lets nutrients in and removes waste. It also communicates with the other cells. If you believe you cannot set boundaries, remember that you have billions of them within you. Draw strength from that creative source within you. If you want some help with building your boundary fence, please reach out to Rose and I. We have the tools to help you design and build your own uniquely landscaped soul space, with fences, and gates.

May your needs be honoured. May your peace be protected. And may you choose what is right and respectful for you.

This poem came to me as I was walking along the river, contemplating this post.

The River.

The river hugs its riverbanks,

it holds them to the left and right.

The banks keep river in her flow

as she confidently knows where to go.

While rocks cause ripples, and speeds increase,

her riverbanks help keep the peace.

River knows her water stays intact,

she travels along without looking back.

Bubbling joyfully as she goes along

the birds sing with her, when her current is strong.

This river can meander at will, cause her riverbanks won’t overspill.

They give her the strength to know who she is, so she can give life to

all she encounters.

River hugs her riverbanks,

and thrives inside them with great Thanks.

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When Healing Comes First: How Emotional Recovery Creates Real Financial Stability

Brittany Blake 10/11/2025 10/11/2025

I’m Brittany Blake, a previous psychotherapist turned financial broker. I want to start with something that might surprise you, control doesn’t come from having perfect budgets. It comes from healing what’s happening inside of you.

For years, we’ve been told the opposite: that if we just learn how to manage our money, track every dollar, and build the “right” plan, then we’ll finally feel safe and secure. But after working with people who are rebuilding their lives after trauma, and walking through my own seasons of rebuilding, I’ve come to see it differently.

True stability doesn’t start with spreadsheets and budgeting. It starts with healing.

When life has fallen apart

I’ll never forget a woman I met early in my career, let’s call her Maya.

She came to me with years of financial abuse behind her. Every dollar had been controlled. She wasn’t allowed access to accounts, and her partner used money to silence her. She wanted to “get it together,” to fix her finances, to start over. But underneath, she was just trying to feel safe again.

In our first meeting, she said, “I don’t even know what safety feels like anymore.”

And that right there, that’s where rebuilding truly begins.

When you’ve lived through trauma, whether that’s emotional abuse, financial control, loss, or betrayal, your nervous system learns to live on high alert. You can have the best plan in the world, but if your body still feels unsafe, it’s nearly impossible to stick to it.

The story we’ve been sold is fix the money, then you’ll heal

So many financial programs focus on control, on the “doing.”

Budget better. Save more. Hustle harder. Doesn’t sound too empowering does it?

But this doesn’t work for people who are rebuilding after trauma. Because what’s underneath the spending patterns, the debt, the avoidance, or even the over-control isn’t laziness, it’s pain and survival mode.

In fact, research backs this up. Studies in Canada show that women who’ve experienced financial or emotional abuse are far more likely to struggle with decision-making and trust when

it comes to money. Around 50% of women in shelter settings have faced financial abuse their partners restricted access, hid assets, or used money as a tool of control.

And the aftermath doesn’t end when the relationship does. Survivors carry deep emotional scars, fear of conflict, fear of asking for help, fear of making “wrong” decisions. (WomanACT, 2020)

So when you try to “fix the money” before healing the fear and shame behind it, the old patterns tend to return. Because it’s not a math problem, it’s an emotional one.

The shift: when healing is your foundation

I’ve spent years in the financial sector, and before that, I worked as a trauma-informed psychotherapist. And over and over again, I’ve seen this truth: when a person begins to heal emotionally, their entire relationship with money changes.

Here’s what that looks like:

1. You start to feel safe in your own body again

Until your body feels safe, numbers will always feel threatening. That’s just how trauma works. Healing might start with grounding, journaling, therapy, or breathwork, not because those

things fix your finances directly, but because they help you come back to yourself.

2. You begin to understand your money story

We all carry old stories about money, things we were told as children or learned through painful experiences.

“Money doesn’t grow on trees.” “People like us never get ahead.” “I’m just not good with money.”

Healing helps you notice those beliefs instead of being ruled by them.

3. You rebuild your sense of choice

Trauma can feel like it takes away choice. It tells you that control lives outside of you, like its in someone else’s hands.

Healing reminds you: you have power. You have the right to ask questions and to create your own financial life. The moment you start making small choices that align with your healed self, that’s when stability starts to grow.

Healing + action = real change

Here’s something I always emphasize: healing alone isn’t enough.

At some point, we need to take what’s happening internally and implement it in tangible ways, otherwise, we stay stuck in awareness without progress.

That’s where support comes in.

Having someone beside you who understands trauma and money, someone who doesn’t shame you for where you are, can make all the difference.

Because let’s be honest: it’s one thing to talk about “empowerment,” and it’s another to know what to actually do next. Whether it’s rebuilding credit, understanding your insurance, or learning where to be investing, you deserve support that’s compassionate, informed, and practical.

In my work as a financial professional, I’ve seen people transform not because they had the “perfect” plan, but because they had someone walking beside them, step by step. Together, we created small wins that built confidence, and that confidence became the foundation for bigger financial choices.

If you’re reading this and feeling unsure where to start, here are a few small ways to begin:

● Start with safety: Before you open your bank app or budget, take a deep breath. Feel your feet on the ground. Remind yourself that you are safe at this moment.

● Write your money story: What are your earliest memories of money? What emotions come up when you think about it? There’s power in simply noticing without judgment.

● Try micro-steps:

○ Save $5 a week in a “safety fund.”

○ Track one spending category for two weeks.

○ Say “no” to one financial obligation that doesn’t align with your values.

● Find accountability: Whether it’s a trusted friend, a coach, or a financial advisor, find someone who can hold you accountable with kindness — not criticism.

Remember, this isn’t about being perfect. It’s about learning to trust yourself again.

You are not behind. You are rebuilding.

If you’re in this season, please know: there’s nothing wrong with you. Financial instability after trauma is not a reflection of your worth — it’s a natural response to what you’ve lived through.

In fact, studies show that 71% of Canadian women report that financial stress is impacting their mental health. (Benefits Canada, 2024) You are not alone in this.

Healing your relationship with money isn’t about becoming someone else — it’s about remembering who you are, underneath the fear and scarcity.

My invitation to you is to Join The Wealthy Canadian Series

If this message resonates with you, if you’re ready to start healing emotionally and taking grounded steps toward financial stability. I want to personally invite you into The Wealthy Canadian Series, did I mention this is FREE

This isn’t a “budget bootcamp.” It’s a safe, supportive space created for Canadians to learn the basic financial strategies we should have been taught in school. You’ll gain tools, support, and strategies, but more importantly, you’ll rediscover your sense of choice.

You don’t have to do this alone. You deserve guidance that meets you where you are, with compassion, education, and hope.

If your heart is whispering “it’s time,” trust that. That’s your cue to take one small, brave step forward.

👉Join The Wealth Canadian Series: https://www.teamdld.com/TheWealthyCanadianChallenge

Healing is messy, nonlinear, and holy work. So is rebuilding your financial life. But I promise, every small act of healing you do creates ripples of stability that touch every area of your life.

You are not behind. You are becoming.

And when healing leads, money follows.

If you’d like to book a 1:1 with me please do so here: https://calendar.app.google/frBTLS21i2MG1qpo6

Handling Life

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Nourish Yourself

Judy Johnston 09/21/2025 09/24/2025

Nourish Yourself

How many times have we heard that to be healthy, all one needs is a good diet and exercise? Diet is one of the most frequent search requests on Google.

In a land of great abundance, and variety of food stuffs, how can it be that so many Canadians and Americans are struggling with metabolic syndromes? Weight gain, diabetes, menopause belly, middle age spread, are key words used in media to sell the latest fad, or discovery or drug. Recently I had a panel of bloodwork done as part of an annual screening. As I looked around the clinic on this early morning , there were so many different people each searching for a healthy life. I started to wonder why are the numbers so high? Below are some interesting studies regarding North America and Canadian diets.

A study from 2019 by Chef’s Pencil found that Canada was the ninth most diet-obsessed country in the world, with keto being the most popular diet.
Companies like Mintel conduct surveys to understand consumer attitudes and beliefs about diet and nutrition in Canada. Stats Canada published a yearly report this past March stating the cost of food has been a challenge for many. Anyone who has been in a grocery store this year can attest to that.
84% of Canadians believe that what they eat impacts their physical well-being.
One in four Canadians have dietary restrictions or preferences, especially those under 34 who lean towards dairy-free, vegetarian, or vegan options.

The food production industry has become more industrialized, globalized and consolidated. Massive corporations driven by increasing profits and technological advancements have created a decline in crop diversity, and soil regeneration, and have increased the amount of chemicals found in food. Glyphosate use and pesticides-ready seed crops are known to cause damage to the human biome and interfere with our digestive system and the energy of the cells. Ultra-processed foods contain no nutritional value. [See Dr. Mark Hyman’s website for suggestions on eating to improve longevity and functional wellness.] Dr James D, Adamo writes in his book “Eat Right for your Blood Type” of the correlation between our blood type and the exercise method and diet best suited for each person. I have found this information to be valuable and effective.

From an early age we are told to eat our vegetables. Given the number of phytonutrients, vitamins and the source of fibre vegetables provide, this is good advice. There are so many to choose from, it is not hard to find a vegetable to suit every palate. I look for organic fruits and vegetables. Local markets or small farmstands are good places to find quality foods, while supporting your neighbourhood farmers. Greenhart Farms offers a farm-share program, delivering fresh picked, organic vegetables and fruits weekly, during the spring to fall seasons. Look in your area for a similar program, as it supports farm families, while feeding your family quality foods.

If we view food as the way to nourish our cells, and well-being, we will choose the foods providing for optimal performance. Do an assessment of your cupboards and fridge. What foods support your nutrition goals and what items bring no value and cause your body to work hard to detoxify the chemical ingredients in them? Choose the foods that serve you best.

What if the secret to being energetic and vibrant isn’t what we put in our mouth, but what comes out of it?

Most people believe that food is the most important element for our energy level. It isn’t. The most essential need for human beings’ energy needs is breath.

Breath is the first essential need for human beings. Water is the second essential need for human beings. Only 3 percent of your energy needs come from food.

A person can live about 70 days without food, according to a McGill University Office for Science and Society article published on Jan 10^th, 2025. So why are we so food obsessed? This article also states that humans cannot live longer than 5 days without water. Going without water, impairs the detoxification process and harms the kidneys. We know dehydration impacts brain function, even at low levels of dehydration. But few people can go longer than 3 minutes without air. Breathing is essential to every cell. The breath of life nourishes us. Most of us don’t give breathing a second thought until we have a stuffed-up nose. It comes automatically. Focusing on your breathing is a proven way of calming the central nervous system. As we increase the function of the lungs, heart and circulatory system, we improve our energy and mental functioning. It is no wonder that most spiritual practices start with the breath. Jesus tells us “ I am the bread of life” “ I am the breath of life” How interesting is it that those are the two things that get centered out.

I encourage you to take a few minutes to sit quietly and breathe deeply. Being quiet in nature is a great way to experience a renewal of energy. In my garden is a plaque that reads, ““Kiss of the sun for pardon. Song of the birds for mirth. You’re closer to God’s heart in a garden than any place else on earth.”— Dorothy Frances Gurney

We nourish ourselves not only with food. We nourish ourselves with quiet stillness. We nourish ourselves with time spend with friends. Laughter delights our soul. A good book may nourish your mind. Take a moment today and ask yourself “What do I need to be nourished?”

May you be nourished in mind, body and spirit.

Blog Posts Handling Life

Featured

How Much is Too Much?

Judy Johnston 08/08/2025 08/13/2025

How much is too much?

Recently I had been tasked with the sorting and clearing of my Mother-In-Law’s apartment. She had fallen and because of her failing health went from the hospital to a nursing home. It was challenging on many levels. She no longer had the mental capacity to make decisions for herself. Therefore, I along with my husband, her son, had to decide what to do with all the stuff.

As a woman who had placed a great value on her appearance, the incredible volume of clothing bore testament to that. There were 5 closets, 4 dressers and one wardrobe packed full of fashion.

It was like a time capsule from the 1960’s to present day. Most of her pieces were in excellent condition, some still with price tags on them. Desired, purchased yet never worn. Brigitte lived in a time when women would get dressed up to go out. She wouldn’t see visitors, friends or family without having had her hair done. A trip to the hairdresser was a weekly occurrence in her younger days. She loved to sew. Her singer sewing machine in it’s hardwood desk cabinet still works. There were some blazers and skirts in her closet, pinned but not yet completed. Although she had not sewn in the last 2 decades.

She dressed impeccably with the matching necklaces, earrings and broaches. Shoes and purses matched or co-ordinated. Belts from every age, hung like an art design, sparkling when the light hit them. Brigitte had worked in retail and would recount the stories of how she would set aside a garment when the new season’s style came in, so she always had the current fashion. Most of the clothing in her closets had not been worn in years, perhaps decades. She had 26 pleated skirts, still in the drycleaner plastic coverings, some brand new. That was just the pleated skirts. There were kilts, pencil skirts, flowing maxis, so many culottes. Glamorous dresses with sequins, I wish I could have seen her in those days.

Eight years ago when she and my father-in-law moved from their house to the apartment. I remember asking if she wanted to donate some of her extra clothing. A sharp No was her response. She could not comprehend how I could possibly suggest such an outrageous thing! These were her things. I understand it. Although most of the clothing in her closet hadn’t been worn since she was in her 40’s, it was the memory that she held on to so fiercely. In holding so tight to the past, she did not allow much room for the present. She wanted the past back. She longed for it, to the point that it was almost the only topic of conversation that interested her. She also did not let go of any perceived slight or insult, never forgiving and often bringing up in conversation the day, so and so, did such and such. As a Purebioenergy Healing Therapist, and a person who had spent the last 20 plus years learning about healing, I knew that holding onto the anger, grief, sadness and bitterness was hurting her body and her mind.

She valued her privacy and did not want people in her home. She had cut herself off from the world, choosing not to go out, nor have anyone in. My husband and I used to joke, we were her minions. Just do what needs doing, and do not expect any gratitude or you will just set yourself up for disappointment. I do feel empathy for her. A person gets to choose what matters in their life.

Brigitte used to like a hot coffee and kuchen, (German for cake) every afternoon. I would bring her a coffee from Tim’s, and a slice of cake from the German bakery. It had to be fresh. She would be happy for a few minutes. My father-in-law when he was alive baked cake every 3 days, so there was fresh cake always available. Now she can only eat minced food, so I am glad she had enjoyed her cake for all those years.

As I sorted, cleaned, cleared, boxed up and carefully folded the items to be donated or consigned. I am hopeful that perhaps a women may receive or purchase one of the 26 pleated skirts for a job interview, or a graduation ceremony for herself or her child. Perhaps that women will have a girl’s day out to a theatre and tea house with her friends. These are beautiful skirts, some never worn with the original labels still on them, Made in Canada of Canadian wool. As I did this labour of love, I found myself pondering “How much is too much?”

Four sets of fancy china dishes, some never have been used, rarely for a family gathering, waiting for a special occasion. There is a sadness to waiting for the right time to use the good dishes, that sit gathering dust in the china cabinet. All the crystal glasses – many now at my house, until I decide what to do with them. Many have already been donated to The Retail Therapy Store. How many are too many?

As a child my husband was not allowed to have friends over, less they made a mess of the house. His mother valued a clean house, never allowed a pet, although she liked cats. My MIL’s identity was very much tied up in how she, her house, her car, had to be perfect in her eyes. She would get very upset if it wasn’t. She had an image of perfection. It is very difficult to hold up the illusion of perfection. It is also challenging to live your life under the auspices of what will the neighbours think. How can you be free to be yourself, when you are constantly worried you may do something inappropriate, not fully knowing what inappropriate is, yet knowing you will be judged harshly for it?

The other observation I had as a cleared, cleaned, and dealt with all this stuff was my realization of how angry and resentful I was becoming. This responsibility had been dumped on us, myself especially. Prior to my father-in-law’s death at age 86, they had years to declutter, downsize the excess, and clear out the stuff. He purposely left all of it for us to deal with and told us so. Granted he had been ill in the last year and had been the caregiver for his wife for years. Last summer, my husband and I cleared out the property my F.I.L owned. This is the second time, we are left cleaning up the mess. How many women experience this is their lives: Left with the responsibility of clearing messes not of their own making? Left with the responsibility of cleaning up stuff that not even their stuff? I know a woman who left her home in BC, to come to KW to clear out her parent’s place, after they had died. It took her a year and a half to deal with the Estate responsibilities. How much is too much?

These past 18 months, since the death of my father-in-law have been too much. The last six months have taken a toll. There is a cost to having to do this. A cost of time, the time away from my own children and grandchild, the time away from my business, and my commitment to clients, my business partner and our creative offerings. A cost to my relationship to my husband, I am thankful we can talk out all the angst this has caused. He is exhausted. We have not had a summer, as this has been all consuming. All our weekends, and after his full time work hours have been spent clearing. This is thankless work, and it is hard work. Mentally, making the decisions, booking appointments, dealing with financial institutions, hours on hold with Bell Canada for a simple cancellation. Organizing years of photos, collections, shredding old paperwork. Physically, it is demanding, moving furniture, carrying heavy boxes, cleaning repeatedly, and lifting heavy, cumbersome items. Then addressing the emotional side as, one processes all the emotions that arise as you do it. There is a cost to my health, and my husband’s health. Thank God for PureBioenergy Healing Therapy. We will take time to reset, refresh and renew ourselves. My heart can empathize with the many caregivers who struggle looking after aging parents.

The moral of this story is take responsibility for your stuff – your physical stuff, your emotional stuff, your financial stuff. Do it Now. It is not an act of love to make your children bear the burden of you not taking responsibility and addressing that which needs to be done. Let’s Clean up our act. There are many ways in which less is more.

I am going through my own closet, as I do once or twice a year, asking myself what no longer fits my lifestyle? Don’t let your stuff clutter up your space, your mind and your being. Release it, let it go. A few minutes a week, to sort the receipts, the accounts, and payments builds your confidence. It feels empowering to know where your funds are going, and to see your savings growing. A clean, organized home creates a calm, peaceful environment contributing to our well-being.

A poem by Judy

Life’s Journey

As you go along this journey of life,

Take a photo and travel light.

Keep the happy memory, release with Love, the sad.

You will find then, even the darkest days are not so bad.

Recount the laughter, the fun times, the Cheer

Let the irritations and disagreements disappear.

Keep your friendships current,

Keep your backpack light,

So you are always ready,

In a moment’s notice to go

And join the next adventure

Sans burden your trek to slow.

The stuff you can release it,

It only holds you back

And when it comes right down to it,

Its only faith we lack.

Spend your time with Loved ones

We all grow up too quick

Spend your coin on caring

Less the tax man takes his pick

Celebrate the moments,

Forgive and your will find,

This journey life provides for us

Is truly quite sublime.

Blog Posts Handling Life

Featured

Just One Thing

Judy Johnston 06/28/2025 06/30/2025

In this day of instant media, constant information, increased speed of life’s expectations, it is easy to see how one can experience a feeling of being overwhelmed. The feeling of having too much to do, and no time to do it in. The feeling that no matter what I do, it isn’t enough. Many women have so many responsibilities, it is a wonder they can relax at all. Yet relaxation is essential to renewing our minds, and our bodies. Not to mention our spirit which is where our energy resides. Your intuition or inner knowing needs to have quiet or calm so you can hear it. Today, let’s look at some ways that we can “Be Still…” and connect to our heart, so our minds and bodies can function better.

What are the symptoms/effects of over-thinking?

Have you ever felt like your thoughts are running in circles, but you’re too drained to take a single step forward? One thought leads to the next To Do on the list, and at the same time you may feel guilt or irritation that you are not further towards your goal. Let’s not make our goal our gaol. Let’s just pause, breathe for a minute.

Overwhelm and overthinking often creep in quietly, but their symptoms are unmistakable. For women healing from emotional trauma, it can feel like your inner world is on high alert—even when everything on the outside seems quiet.

You might notice it in these subtle but powerful ways:

Common Symptoms of Overwhelm & Overthinking

Procrastination: Not because you’re lazy, but because your mind is overloaded, and you don’t know where to begin. Procrastination is a double-edged sword. We know we need to do something, we think about it a lot. The thinking about it, creates an upset or irritation yet it doesn’t move us close to task. The deadline may be looming and our avoidance is in full bloom. Being told “just get’er done” isn’t helpful. Be kind. If you are feeling this don’t criticize yourself. Acknowledge it.
Irritation & Mood Swings: Your patience wears thin, and small things feel massive. Some days I ask myself, Dang, Why do I feel so bitchy?
Worry & Racing Thoughts: Your mind constantly replays scenarios or “what ifs”, even when you’re trying to rest.
Insomnia or Restless Sleep: You lie in bed tired but wired, unable to shut off the mental noise. Our friendly hormones can keep our mind caught in a loop. Less sleep equals more irritability.
Apathy or Numbness: You feel stuck, unmotivated, or emotionally disconnected from your goals and dreams. Just feel like “MEH”.

These aren’t just inconveniences. They’re signals from your body and nervous system asking for attention, care, and recalibration.

So What Can You Do When You Feel Overwhelmed?

The healing journey doesn’t require perfection or doing everything at once. It simply begins with one small, grounded step.

Here are gentle but powerful remedies to help move you from frozen to focused:

1. Just Do One Thing

Start with one simple task. Make your bed. Send that email. Drink a glass of water. When your brain feels scattered, completing just one thing helps shift you from chaos to clarity. It reminds your nervous system: You’re capable. You’re moving forward. Make “Just One Thing” your mantra.

2. Make a ‘Need-to-Do’ List

Write it out. Not just in your head. Getting your thoughts on paper stops the mental loop. You release the pressure to remember everything and can begin to prioritize what truly matters.

Writing it out also let’s us figure out what is in our control. Often we worry about other people’s reactions to us, spiking our stress levels when we let other’s expectations live in our minds. Worry takes away our peace. Choose to protect your peace.

3. Analyze & Delegate

Look at your list and ask:

What must I do because it aligns with my values or goals?
What can I delegate, delay, or even delete?

This isn’t about doing more, it’s about doing what’s meaningful and letting go of the rest.

4. Use Your Strengths to Build Confidence

What comes naturally to you? Organization, creativity, empathy, listening? Tap into your strengths first, they’ll energize you. Every time you act from your strengths, you build momentum, clarity, and self-trust. We all have been given gifts. When we use our gifts, we feel good, confident and happy. Remember when you delegate something to someone, you let them use their gifts too. You are doing a service to another person. That action brings you a boost of “feel good” dopamine. Do good because it’s good for you.

5. Act: Do the Thing. The congratulate yourself for Doing the Thing! When you complete a task, especially one you’ve been avoiding, your brain releases dopamine, often called the “feel-good” or “motivation” hormone. It’s a chemical reward that makes you feel a sense of pleasure, accomplishment, and momentum.

Even small actions, like crossing something off your to-do list or cleaning a drawer, give your brain a dopamine hit. This is why the “Just Do One Thing” strategy works so well, it kickstarts the reward system in your brain and shifts you out of freeze mode.

Why Dopamine Matters:

Dopamine isn’t just about pleasure. It’s part of your brain’s reward system, a system designed to reinforce positive behavior. When you take action and feel good afterward, your brain learns something very important:

“Taking action helps me feel better.”

Each time this happens, your brain builds a new neural pathway, what we call a positive feedback loop or even “success circuitry.”

It Looks Like This:

Cue: You feel overwhelmed
Action: You do one small thing
Reward: Dopamine makes you feel good
Reinforcement: Your brain says, “Let’s do that again.”

Over time, this rewires the default pattern of procrastination and freeze into a new one of confidence, momentum, and inner trust.

Where PureBioenergy Healing Comes In

When your nervous system is dysregulated from trauma or emotional exhaustion, even small tasks can feel impossible. That’s why PureBioenergy Healing Therapy is such a powerful ally.

By calming the mind, restoring energetic balance, and releasing stored emotional tension, it creates the inner stillness and spaciousness required for clarity and aligned action. You no longer feel hijacked by racing thoughts or paralyzed by fear, you feel centered, capable, and connected to your intuition.

How PureBioenergy Healing Therapy Helps

When you’re overwhelmed, your mind can become a torrential storm, tossing and tormenting you. PureBioenergy Healing Therapy offers a deeply calming space for your nervous system to reset.

Here’s what it does :

Calms the racing mind without requiring you to relive past trauma.
Creates deep relaxation in both body and mind, allowing restorative rest.
Enhances focus and clarity, helping you get out of “fog brain”.
Restores your energetic balance, so you feel lighter, grounded, and more present.
Connects you to your intuition, making decision-making clearer and more confident.
Decreases or stops Pain, so your body can rest, renew, and restore.
Improves Sleep: Sleep is essential for healing.

You Are Not Lazy. You Are Healing.

Overwhelm and overthinking are not flaws. They are protective responses from a nervous system that’s been through too much for too long.

The good news? You don’t have to stay in that stuck place.

With simple tools, supportive community, and powerful energy healing, you can find your way back to focus, flow, and peace.

Your Next Step:

If you’re feeling scattered or shut down right now, start small.

✔️ Just do one thing.
✔️ Make your list.
✔️ Ask for help.
✔️ Book a PureBioenergy Healing Therapy session.

Rose and I understand because we have lived it. I don’t just teach this, I live it. Reach out if you have questions or just want an understanding listener. We are here to serve. Do Just One thing today to bring you some peace, joy and happiness.

You deserve a life that feels clear, calm, and deeply connected to you.

Handling Life

Featured

Fortunes: A Feminine Shift in Perspective

Rose 04/24/2025 04/24/2025

There’s a softness that settles over us when we begin to see our lives not through the lens of what’s missing, but through the warm, golden light of what is.

This week, amidst the rush of retreat planning, our Women’s Wisdom Wednesdays, the rhythm of upcoming trainings, bookkeeping, and the focus demanded by a grant application, and a battle with ants, I found myself pausing.

I purposefully enjoyed a quiet moment, with a mug of tea in hand. I had read a passage from Ryan Holiday’s The Daily Stoic, where he shared reflections on Marcus Aurelius and the idea of fortune. And what I read settled into my heart like a seed in fertile soil.

Marcus Aurelius, a Roman Emperor and Stoic philosopher, lived a life that would challenge the strongest of us. Wars. Plagues. The death of nine of his children. A failing body. Yet never do we see him collapse under the weight of grief or bitterness.

Instead, he writes:

“I was once a fortunate man,” he writes, “and at some point, fortune abandoned me.” Even here he counters to himself with hope. “True good fortune is what you make for yourself,” he writes. “Good fortune: good character, good intentions, and good actions.” Whenever he speaks of his ‘misfortune,’ he quickly corrects himself. “No, it’s fortunate that this happened,” he writes. “It’s fortunate that this happened and I’ve remained unharmed by it.”

He reframes misfortune as opportunity.

Pain as a proving ground.

Loss as a teacher.

His words shine not because they ignore suffering, but because they hold it tenderly and choose to grow anyway.

True fortune, he said, is not what happens to us, but how we choose to meet it.

And that, my dear, changes everything.

Reimagining Fortune in Our Modern Lives

How often do we count our fortunes based on what is in our bank account or what we don’t yet have?

The dream house.

The bigger bank account.

The better body.

The perfect partner.

The world around us, especially through the shiny lens of TikTok reels and curated Instagram feeds, whispers constantly:

You need more.

You deserve more.

You should want more.

And we listen.

We scroll through highlight reels of strangers and start to feel dull in comparison.

We buy the latest skincare line, kitchen gadget, self-improvement or exercise program hoping it will finally fill that mysterious, nagging gap inside us.

But more stuff doesn’t satisfy the ache. Doing more does not satisfy the ache.

It only adds clutter. Clutter to our homes, our computers and yes, but more deeply, to our minds and hearts.

Our judgment becomes clouded, not by a lack of wisdom, but by a culture that makes us feel like what we already hold isn’t enough, that we are not enough.

The Treasure We Already Hold

When we pause – truly pause – we can begin to see the richness already woven into our lives.

Not riches in the traditional sense, but the kind that feeds our soul.

Like:

The soft strength of a woman who’s survived heartbreak and still opens her heart again.
The quiet courage it takes to begin again after loss or betrayal.
The peace found in a morning coffee.
A walk to look at spring’s first blooms.
Or the giggle of a child.
The way our bodies carry us – even if aching, even if weary – toward healing.

These, too, are fortunes. They are treasures.

When we tend to these inner riches with love and awareness, our desire for more stuff begins to soften. We no longer chase the next shiny object, or the next generation of smart phones.

We cultivate the gems already nestled in our own lives.

Clearing the Clutter to See Clearly Again

Letting go of unnecessary things—physical and emotional—creates space for clarity. Not just in our closets, but in our choices. In our relationships. In our sense of self.

Every item we own, every piece of decor and drawer of untouched makeup, carries a story or an expectation. And when those stories are born from “not enoughness,” we end up weighed down by the very things we thought would set us free.

Marcus Aurelius reminds us that freedom is an inner state. It comes not from what we accumulate, but from how we think, how we act, and how we choose to rise.

“Good fortune: good character, good intentions, and good actions.”

So maybe we can ask ourselves:

What if I am already fortunate?
What if everything I truly need to feel full, to feel purposeful, to feel loved… is already within and around me?
What if fortune is not a prize to earn, but a presence to notice?

A Gentle Invitation

Today, I invite you to look around your life with softer eyes. Notice the beauty in what you already hold—the laugh lines on your face, the friend who texted “thinking of you,” the sunbeam warming your favorite chair.

Notice your own heart’s resilience. Its desire to grow. Its capacity for joy, even in sorrow.

You are not lacking, darling. You are layered in riches this world can’t always measure.

So, take a breath.

Release the chase.

And let fortune be something you make by living well, loving deeply, and choosing—again and again—to see the good.

Even in hardship.

Especially then.

Handling Life

Featured

Stress, Distress, Eustress and You

Judy Johnston 04/11/2025 05/14/2025

As we go along this path called life, we may at some points find ourselves in situations, environments, relationships, or circumstances that we consider stressful. These bumps along the road, which can, at times feel more like craters rather than just a pothole to avoid, impact us in many ways. No human is immune to times of stress. Even Queen Elizabeth II had what she phrased as her “annus horribilis”.

”1992 is not a year on which I shall look back with undiluted pleasure. In the words of one of my more sympathetic correspondents, it has turned out to be an annus horribilis”

Stress is considered part of life. But what exactly is stress?

Hans Selye, a pioneering endocrinologist, introduced the concept of “stress” in a medical context and developed the General Adaptation Syndrome model to describe the body’s response to stressors.

The physical, chemical, and biological responses in his theory of resistance or adaptation after an injury. “Stress,” Selye insisted, “is essentially the rate of all the wear and tear caused by life.”¹ Selye identified these stages as alarm, resistance, and exhaustion. Understanding these different responses and how they relate to each other may help you cope with stress. The Alarm stage is the immediate response to an event, imagine being cut off while driving in heavy traffic, your heart rate and breathing increase, you may swear, and feel tense. Once the danger passes your heart rate , breathing return to normal. The fight-or-flight or freeze response that occurs in the alarm stage is for your protection. A higher hormone level of cortisone, or adrenaline is for your benefit. It provides you with energy and improves your concentration so you can focus and tackle the situation. When stress is short-term or short-lived, the alarm stage isn’t harmful.

Some stressful situations, like going through a divorce, or a high stress job continue for extended periods of time. If the stress is not resolved, your body remains on high alert, it eventually adapts and learns how to live with a higher stress level. In this stage, the body goes through changes that you may not be conscious of to cope with stress.

Your body continues to secrete the stress hormones and your blood pressure remains elevated. You may think you’re managing stress well, but your body’s physical response tells a different story. If the resistance stage continues for too long without the break needed to reset, restore and recover to offset the effects of stress, this can lead to the exhaustion stage. Resistance stage includes irritability, frustration and poor concentration. Sleep is interrupted, not as deep, and does not get to the necessary stage of cell renewal.

The exhaustion stage is the result of prolonged, chronic stress. Exhaustion stage happens when your physical, emotional and mental resources are drained to the point where you can no longer have the strength to fight stress. A little event may be what breaks the proverbial camels back. Hopelessness, fatigue, burnout, depression and anxiety are indicators, of this stage. Decreased stressed tolerance and decreased immunity also factor in. The physical effects put you at risk for stress-related illness.

When does stress become a problem? What can we do to counter the effects of stress?

The specific ranking of life events by stress level, known as the Social Readjustment Rating Scale (SRRS), was developed by psychiatrists Thomas Holmes and Richard Rahe in 1967. This scale assigns Life Change Units (LCUs) to various life events to quantify their stress impact. The top 10 stress-inducing life events according to the SRRS are:

Death of a spouse – 100 LCUs
Divorce – 73 LCUs
Marital separation – 65 LCUs
Imprisonment – 63 LCUs
Death of a close family member – 63 LCUs
Personal injury or illness – 53 LCUs
Marriage – 50 LCUs
Dismissal from work – 47 LCUs
Marital reconciliation – 45 LCUs
Retirement – 45 LCUs

These events are considered significant stressors that may increase the risk of health issues. It’s important to note that individual responses to these events can vary, and personal coping mechanisms play a crucial role in managing stress. Remember, this prognosis may not be true in all cases for all people. It depends on the individual. The belief system they have, the support they have, and the coping mechanisms they employ. A marriage is happy occasion so why would it be on the list? A marriage brings with it change. Change is not a bad thing and is often a necessary requirement to advancement and growth. It is how we perceive change that creates either a resistance or enhancement response in us. A wedding can be stressful due to the perceived obligations, we put upon ourselves. It can also be a joyous celebration of the love we share. Eustress is a positive stress. It is performance enhancing, often a short-term experience where one has perceived control, and it improves well-being. Imagine studying for a big exam, or interview, excelling at it, and the confidence, joy and courage you receive because of your efforts. The impetus, the push either from yourself or a coach, parent, mentor, advisor, trainer is needed to get you to do the work required to reach your full potential. That is one of the reasons for deadlines. Humans are motivated by either the pleasure of reward, or by the avoidance of the pain, disappointment, or penalty or embarrassment of not doing the ‘thing’. The whole income tax system in this country is precipitated by this principle. How many people find doing their tax return to be stressful? It is the reward at the end of a challenge that we focus on. This is true of so many projects, endeavors, goals we set. There may well be frustrations along the path to the goal. Focus on the result. Jeff Kranos tell us that “Acute short-term stress in the human body confers a health benefit and activates pathways that promote longevity and resilience.” Good Stress. To build muscle, the muscle fibres need to be worked beyond their current capacity. Then rest is required, nutrition to fuel the growth of the muscle before the muscle is ready to be worked again. Good Stress.

Distress on the other hand, decreases performance. It can come with emotional, physical, and mental symptoms including but not limited to, back pain, headaches, digestive issues, irritability, emotional outburst of anger, tears, sadness, apathy, lack of self-care, vision issues, sleep disturbances, mood swings, and brain fog or lack of focus or feelings of overwhelm. If we stay in Distress for too long, it can lead to more serious issues like depression, high blood pressure, adrenal, hormonal and heart concerns. Distress can lead to dis ease. Distress doesn’t allow for the rest and recovery period. Our minds, bodies and emotions need to have a rest period to renew, restore and grow.

The Good News is: You have the keys to change the outcome. Our beautiful brains have plasticity. Most our bodies cells renew daily. Your biofield contains the energy of life. It gives you the energy to live well. Bioenergy, the energy of life, provides us with the energy, needed to live. When the bioenergy is gone, the body is life-less. Bio means life. So be good to your biofield. “The body is an energy system in constant energetic interaction with its environment.” “Healing happens on a non-conscious level through a transformation of the way you think and act.” Z. Hochstatter. Our thoughts create. It is essential to watch your thoughts.

Here is a list of practical things you can do starting today to help balance your stress levels.

1: Identify whether you are stressed. Just because something is happening outside of you, does not mean you need to stress about it. You can choose whether you want it to concern you or not. 2: Identify your stressor. Is it a physical environment, work environment, personal relationship, your self-image? Are your thoughts destructive to your peace of mind? Are you at battle with your values?

3: Identify the reason for stressor. Can you change your location if it is too noisy, or the temperature is irritating? Is it an internal or external stressor? Are there steps you can take to change? Now make a plan.

4: Identify and apply an appropriate stress management strategy. You can make changes to how you are living. Sit down and write a list of what is bothering you. Leave space to write in the answers/solutions to the concerns. Make another list of how you would like your life to be. Be specific.

Ask yourself what habits are detrimental to your well-being? What are you doing to bring joy into your daily life? Can you speak with a trusted friend, counsellor or therapist?

DO some physical activity, preferably outside! Walking for 25 minutes a day has been proven to lower blood pressure and improve the metabolic rate. Look at your diet. Sugar is a killer. Sugar feeds cancer and disrupts hormones. ( I like cake on special occasions too. A delicious chocolate cake brings me joy. One of the things that make it special is that it is a special occasional treat, not a staple food:} I bless it and eat it.

Every month Rose and I offer a PureBioenergy Healing Therapy for Stress Reduction. We know that stress causes 80% or more of all illnesses. “The energy we work with is informed. It is creative. This means it has the power to create or recreate the well-being of the person. When this happens, it happens on all levels. It happens on the physical level, emotional level, mental level and spiritual level. “We don’t address the illness, we address the health.” Zoran Hochstatter – 3 Chairs. Sign up for and attend the 4 day PureBioenergy Healing Therapy Online. Experience the change that happens when you start to be healthy, happy and joyful. Private PureBioenergy Healing Therapy is available in person or by distance for specific issues or ailments as well. You can reach me at purebioenergy4life@gmail.com to set up an appointment. The reason we offer a monthly PureBioenergy Healing Therapy Online is that it provides a consistent method to balance stress so you do not get to the exhaustive stage. Here is the link to be put on the mailing list for our monthly healing events.

2024 was a highly stressful year for me, and my family. I give credit to God, prayer and PureBioenergy Healing Therapy which I asked for, paid for, and received the many benefits of mental, physically, emotionally and spiritually. I am grateful for the friends that checked in, walked with me, and made me laugh along the way. Stress can make us a stronger, resilient compassionate person. We manage stress, so it does not control us.

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Power! It’s All in Your Head.

Rose 01/22/2025 12/16/2025

The kettle whistles softly in the background as you sit across from me at the kitchen table. The scent of Constant Comment tea fills the air, and I slide a warm mug in front of you. You’ve come to me with a heaviness in your heart, searching for answers or maybe just a listening ear.

We’ve all been there—feeling stuck, unsure of the next step, and hoping for something or someone to swoop in and make it all better. But my dear, let me tell you something that took me far too long to learn.

Everything you need is already within you.

The Search for Solutions

“You know,” I begin, taking a sip of my tea, “we often look outside ourselves for solutions. We think, ‘If only someone could fix this for me’ or ‘Maybe there’s a magic pill to make it all go away.’ But the truth is, the power to change your life is sitting right between your ears. It’s all in your head.”

You tilt your head, intrigued but skeptical. “In my head? How do you mean?”

“Your thoughts,” I say, setting down my mug. “What you think about—how you talk to yourself—creates your reality.

When you focus on complaints and what’s wrong, you stay stuck. But if you shift your focus to possibilities and solutions, that’s where change begins.”

The Trap of Complaining

“Let’s talk about complaining for a minute,” I continue. “It feels good in the moment, doesn’t it? Like letting steam out of a pressure cooker. But here’s the problem: complaining keeps you chained to the negative. It’s like planting weeds in your garden and wondering why nothing beautiful grows.”

You nod slowly, stirring your tea. “I do complain a lot,” you admit. “But it’s hard not to when things feel so overwhelming.”

“I get it,” I say gently. “Life throws curveballs, and sometimes it feels like a storm that never ends. But here’s the question you need to ask yourself: Would you rather complain, or would you rather make a change? You can’t have both.”

The Power of Awareness

“So where do I start?” you ask, leaning forward.

“The first step is awareness,” I say. “You have to tune in to your thoughts. Pay attention to what’s occupying your mind. Are you dwelling on problems, or are you thinking about solutions? Awareness is like turning on the lights in a dark room. You can’t clean up the mess if you don’t see it.”

“That makes sense,” you say. “But how do I figure out why I’m thinking what I’m thinking?”

“Good question,” I say with a smile. “Let me share what helped me to tune in and start making changes.”

Three Steps to Tune In and Make a Change

Step 1: Listen Without Judgment

“First, you have to listen to your thoughts without judging them.

Imagine you’re a curious scientist studying your own mind. Carry a small notebook or use a note app on your phone, and jot down the recurring thoughts you notice throughout the day.

Don’t try to fix them yet; just observe.”

“Even the negative ones?” you ask.

“Especially the negative ones,” I say. “Those are the ones that hold clues about what’s really bothering you.”

Step 2: Ask Why

“Once you’ve identified a thought, ask yourself why it’s there.

Let’s say you keep thinking, ‘I’ll never be good enough.’

Ask yourself: Where does that belief come from? Did someone plant that seed in your mind years ago? Is it based on facts, or is it just a story you’ve been telling yourself?

“The goal is to uncover the root of the thought. When you understand where it comes from, you can decide whether it’s serving you or holding you back.”

Step 3: Choose Your Focus

“Here’s the fun part,” I say, leaning in. “You get to choose what you focus on.

Think of your mind like a radio dial. If you’re tuned into the 66.6 am station ‘Complain and Despair’, switch the dial to 101.1 ‘Hope and Solutions.’

What do you want to create in your life? What small step can you take today to move in that direction?”

“Small steps,” you repeat. “That feels doable.”

“Exactly,” I say. “Change doesn’t happen overnight, but every positive thought, every small action, plants seeds of transformation. And before you know it, your garden starts to bloom.”

The Power of Choice

“Let me tell you something,” I say, looking you in the eye. “You are more powerful than you realize.

The moment you decide to take control of your thoughts, you reclaim your power. It’s not about being perfect or never feeling negative.

It’s about making a choice—over and over again—to focus on what lifts you up rather than what drags you down.”

You sit back, a small smile playing on your lips. “So it really is all in my head, isn’t it?”

“It is,” I say, “but that’s the best news of all. Because if it’s in your head, it means you have the power to change it. And that, my dear, is where your strength lies.”

Moving Forward

As we finish our tea, you seem lighter, as if a tiny spark of hope has been ignited. Change might not be easy, but it’s possible.

And it starts with a simple decision: to tune in, to listen, and to choose.

So, what will you choose today?

Judy and I have published a new book which can help you change the way you think about yourself, called “Belief Blossoms”.

Click here to grab your free copy.