Handling Life – Wounded Women Rising

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Fortunes: A Feminine Shift in Perspective

Rose 04/24/2025 04/24/2025

There’s a softness that settles over us when we begin to see our lives not through the lens of what’s missing, but through the warm, golden light of what is.

This week, amidst the rush of retreat planning, our Women’s Wisdom Wednesdays, the rhythm of upcoming trainings, bookkeeping, and the focus demanded by a grant application, and a battle with ants, I found myself pausing.

I purposefully enjoyed a quiet moment, with a mug of tea in hand. I had read a passage from Ryan Holiday’s The Daily Stoic, where he shared reflections on Marcus Aurelius and the idea of fortune. And what I read settled into my heart like a seed in fertile soil.

Marcus Aurelius, a Roman Emperor and Stoic philosopher, lived a life that would challenge the strongest of us. Wars. Plagues. The death of nine of his children. A failing body. Yet never do we see him collapse under the weight of grief or bitterness.

Instead, he writes:

“I was once a fortunate man,” he writes, “and at some point, fortune abandoned me.” Even here he counters to himself with hope. “True good fortune is what you make for yourself,” he writes. “Good fortune: good character, good intentions, and good actions.” Whenever he speaks of his ‘misfortune,’ he quickly corrects himself. “No, it’s fortunate that this happened,” he writes. “It’s fortunate that this happened and I’ve remained unharmed by it.”

He reframes misfortune as opportunity.

Pain as a proving ground.

Loss as a teacher.

His words shine not because they ignore suffering, but because they hold it tenderly and choose to grow anyway.

True fortune, he said, is not what happens to us, but how we choose to meet it.

And that, my dear, changes everything.

Reimagining Fortune in Our Modern Lives

How often do we count our fortunes based on what is in our bank account or what we don’t yet have?

The dream house.

The bigger bank account.

The better body.

The perfect partner.

The world around us, especially through the shiny lens of TikTok reels and curated Instagram feeds, whispers constantly:

You need more.

You deserve more.

You should want more.

And we listen.

We scroll through highlight reels of strangers and start to feel dull in comparison.

We buy the latest skincare line, kitchen gadget, self-improvement or exercise program hoping it will finally fill that mysterious, nagging gap inside us.

But more stuff doesn’t satisfy the ache. Doing more does not satisfy the ache.

It only adds clutter. Clutter to our homes, our computers and yes, but more deeply, to our minds and hearts.

Our judgment becomes clouded, not by a lack of wisdom, but by a culture that makes us feel like what we already hold isn’t enough, that we are not enough.

The Treasure We Already Hold

When we pause – truly pause – we can begin to see the richness already woven into our lives.

Not riches in the traditional sense, but the kind that feeds our soul.

Like:

The soft strength of a woman who’s survived heartbreak and still opens her heart again.
The quiet courage it takes to begin again after loss or betrayal.
The peace found in a morning coffee.
A walk to look at spring’s first blooms.
Or the giggle of a child.
The way our bodies carry us – even if aching, even if weary – toward healing.

These, too, are fortunes. They are treasures.

When we tend to these inner riches with love and awareness, our desire for more stuff begins to soften. We no longer chase the next shiny object, or the next generation of smart phones.

We cultivate the gems already nestled in our own lives.

Clearing the Clutter to See Clearly Again

Letting go of unnecessary things—physical and emotional—creates space for clarity. Not just in our closets, but in our choices. In our relationships. In our sense of self.

Every item we own, every piece of decor and drawer of untouched makeup, carries a story or an expectation. And when those stories are born from “not enoughness,” we end up weighed down by the very things we thought would set us free.

Marcus Aurelius reminds us that freedom is an inner state. It comes not from what we accumulate, but from how we think, how we act, and how we choose to rise.

“Good fortune: good character, good intentions, and good actions.”

So maybe we can ask ourselves:

What if I am already fortunate?
What if everything I truly need to feel full, to feel purposeful, to feel loved… is already within and around me?
What if fortune is not a prize to earn, but a presence to notice?

A Gentle Invitation

Today, I invite you to look around your life with softer eyes. Notice the beauty in what you already hold—the laugh lines on your face, the friend who texted “thinking of you,” the sunbeam warming your favorite chair.

Notice your own heart’s resilience. Its desire to grow. Its capacity for joy, even in sorrow.

You are not lacking, darling. You are layered in riches this world can’t always measure.

So, take a breath.

Release the chase.

And let fortune be something you make by living well, loving deeply, and choosing—again and again—to see the good.

Even in hardship.

Especially then.

Handling Life

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Stress, Distress, Eustress and You

Judy Johnston 04/11/2025 04/11/2025

As we go along this path called life, we may at some points find ourselves in situations, environments, relationships, or circumstances that we consider stressful. These bumps along the road, which can, at times feel more like craters rather than just a pothole to avoid, impact us in many ways. No human is immune to times of stress. Even Queen Elizabeth II had what she phrased as her “annus horribilis”.

”1992 is not a year on which I shall look back with undiluted pleasure. In the words of one of my more sympathetic correspondents, it has turned out to be an annus horribilis”

Stress is considered part of life. But what exactly is stress?

Hans Selye, a pioneering endocrinologist, introduced the concept of “stress” in a medical context and developed the General Adaptation Syndrome model to describe the body’s response to stressors.

The physical, chemical, and biological responses in his theory of resistance or adaptation after an injury. “Stress,” Selye insisted, “is essentially the rate of all the wear and tear caused by life.”¹ Selye identified these stages as alarm, resistance, and exhaustion. Understanding these different responses and how they relate to each other may help you cope with stress. The Alarm stage is the immediate response to an event, imagine being cut off while driving in heavy traffic, your heart rate and breathing increase, you may swear, and feel tense. Once the danger passes your heart rate , breathing return to normal. The fight-or-flight or freeze response that occurs in the alarm stage is for your protection. A higher hormone level of cortisone, or adrenaline is for your benefit. It provides you with energy and improves your concentration so you can focus and tackle the situation. When stress is short-term or short-lived, the alarm stage isn’t harmful.

Some stressful situations, like going through a divorce, or a high stress job continue for extended periods of time. If the stress is not resolved, your body remains on high alert, it eventually adapts and learns how to live with a higher stress level. In this stage, the body goes through changes that you may not be conscious of to cope with stress.

Your body continues to secrete the stress hormones and your blood pressure remains elevated. You may think you’re managing stress well, but your body’s physical response tells a different story. If the resistance stage continues for too long without the break needed to reset, restore and recover to offset the effects of stress, this can lead to the exhaustion stage. Resistance stage includes irritability, frustration and poor concentration. Sleep is interrupted, not as deep, and does not get to the necessary stage of cell renewal.

The exhaustion stage is the result of prolonged, chronic stress. Exhaustion stage happens when your physical, emotional and mental resources are drained to the point where you can no longer have the strength to fight stress. A little event may be what breaks the proverbial camels back. Hopelessness, fatigue, burnout, depression and anxiety are indicators, of this stage. Decreased stressed tolerance and decreased immunity also factor in. The physical effects put you at risk for stress-related illness.

When does stress become a problem? What can we do to counter the effects of stress?

The specific ranking of life events by stress level, known as the Social Readjustment Rating Scale (SRRS), was developed by psychiatrists Thomas Holmes and Richard Rahe in 1967. This scale assigns Life Change Units (LCUs) to various life events to quantify their stress impact. The top 10 stress-inducing life events according to the SRRS are:

Death of a spouse – 100 LCUs
Divorce – 73 LCUs
Marital separation – 65 LCUs
Imprisonment – 63 LCUs
Death of a close family member – 63 LCUs
Personal injury or illness – 53 LCUs
Marriage – 50 LCUs
Dismissal from work – 47 LCUs
Marital reconciliation – 45 LCUs
Retirement – 45 LCUs

These events are considered significant stressors that may increase the risk of health issues. It’s important to note that individual responses to these events can vary, and personal coping mechanisms play a crucial role in managing stress. Remember, this prognosis may not be true in all cases for all people. It depends on the individual. The belief system they have, the support they have, and the coping mechanisms they employ. A marriage is happy occasion so why would it be on the list? A marriage brings with it change. Change is not a bad thing and is often a necessary requirement to advancement and growth. It is how we perceive change that creates either a resistance or enhancement response in us. A wedding can be stressful due to the perceived obligations, we put upon ourselves. It can also be a joyous celebration of the love we share. Eustress is a positive stress. It is performance enhancing, often a short-term experience where one has perceived control, and it improves well-being. Imagine studying for a big exam, or interview, excelling at it, and the confidence, joy and courage you receive because of your efforts. The impetus, the push either from yourself or a coach, parent, mentor, advisor, trainer is needed to get you to do the work required to reach your full potential. That is one of the reasons for deadlines. Humans are motivated by either the pleasure of reward, or by the avoidance of the pain, disappointment, or penalty or embarrassment of not doing the ‘thing’. The whole income tax system in this country is precipitated by this principle. How many people find doing their tax return to be stressful? It is the reward at the end of a challenge that we focus on. This is true of so many projects, endeavors, goals we set. There may well be frustrations along the path to the goal. Focus on the result. Jeff Kranos tell us that “Acute short-term stress in the human body confers a health benefit and activates pathways that promote longevity and resilience.” Good Stress. To build muscle, the muscle fibres need to be worked beyond their current capacity. Then rest is required, nutrition to fuel the growth of the muscle before the muscle is ready to be worked again. Good Stress.

Distress on the other hand, decreases performance. It can come with emotional, physical, and mental symptoms including but not limited to, back pain, headaches, digestive issues, irritability, emotional outburst of anger, tears, sadness, apathy, lack of self-care, vision issues, sleep disturbances, mood swings, and brain fog or lack of focus or feelings of overwhelm. If we stay in Distress for too long, it can lead to more serious issues like depression, high blood pressure, adrenal, hormonal and heart concerns. Distress can lead to dis ease. Distress doesn’t allow for the rest and recovery period. Our minds, bodies and emotions need to have a rest period to renew, restore and grow.

The Good News is: You have the keys to change the outcome. Our beautiful brains have plasticity. Most our bodies cells renew daily. Your biofield contains the energy of life. It gives you the energy to live well. Bioenergy, the energy of life, provides us with the energy, needed to live. When the bioenergy is gone, the body is life-less. Bio means life. So be good to your biofield. “The body is an energy system in constant energetic interaction with its environment.” “Healing happens on a non-conscious level through a transformation of the way you think and act.” Z. Hochstatter. Our thoughts create. It is essential to watch your thoughts.

Here is a list of practical things you can do starting today to help balance your stress levels.

1: Identify whether you are stressed. Just because something is happening outside of you, does not mean you need to stress about it. You can choose whether you want it to concern you or not. 2: Identify your stressor. Is it a physical environment, work environment, personal relationship, your self-image? Are your thoughts destructive to your peace of mind? Are you at battle with your values?

3: Identify the reason for stressor. Can you change your location if it is too noisy, or the temperature is irritating? Is it an internal or external stressor? Are there steps you can take to change? Now make a plan.

4: Identify and apply an appropriate stress management strategy. You can make changes to how you are living. Sit down and write a list of what is bothering you. Leave space to write in the answers/solutions to the concerns. Make another list of how you would like your life to be. Be specific.

Ask yourself what habits are detrimental to your well-being? What are you doing to bring joy into your daily life? Can you speak with a trusted friend, counsellor or therapist?

DO some physical activity, preferably outside! Walking for 25 minutes a day has been proven to lower blood pressure and improve the metabolic rate. Look at your diet. Sugar is a killer. Sugar feeds cancer and disrupts hormones. ( I like cake on special occasions too. A delicious chocolate cake brings me joy. One of the things that make it special is that it is a special occasional treat, not a staple food:} I bless it and eat it.

Every month Rose and I offer a PureBioenergy Healing Therapy for Stress Reduction. We know that stress causes 80% or more of all illnesses. “The energy we work with is informed. It is creative. This means it has the power to create or recreate the well-being of the person. When this happens, it happens on all levels. It happens on the physical level, emotional level, mental level and spiritual level. “We don’t address the illness, we address the health.” Zoran Hochstatter – 3 Chairs. Sign up for and attend the 4 day PureBioenergy Healing Therapy Online. Experience the change that happens when you start to be healthy, happy and joyful. Private PureBioenergy Healing Therapy is available in person or by distance for specific issues or ailments as well. You can reach me at purebioenergy4life@gmail.com to set up an appointment. The reason we offer a monthly PureBioenergy Healing Therapy Online is that it provides a consistent method to balance stress so you do not get to the exhaustive stage. Here is the link to be put on the mailing list for our monthly healing events.

2024 was a highly stressful year for me, and my family. I give credit to God, prayer and PureBioenergy Healing Therapy which I asked for, paid for, and received the many benefits of mental, physically, emotionally and spiritually. I am grateful for the friends that checked in, walked with me, and made me laugh along the way. Stress can make us a stronger, resilient compassionate person. We manage stress, so it does not control us.

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Power! It’s All in Your Head.

Rose 01/22/2025 01/22/2025

The kettle whistles softly in the background as you sit across from me at the kitchen table. The scent of Constant Comment tea fills the air, and I slide a warm mug in front of you. You’ve come to me with a heaviness in your heart, searching for answers or maybe just a listening ear.

We’ve all been there—feeling stuck, unsure of the next step, and hoping for something or someone to swoop in and make it all better. But my dear, let me tell you something that took me far too long to learn.

Everything you need is already within you.

The Search for Solutions

“You know,” I begin, taking a sip of my tea, “we often look outside ourselves for solutions. We think, ‘If only someone could fix this for me’ or ‘Maybe there’s a magic pill to make it all go away.’ But the truth is, the power to change your life is sitting right between your ears. It’s all in your head.”

You tilt your head, intrigued but skeptical. “In my head? How do you mean?”

“Your thoughts,” I say, setting down my mug. “What you think about—how you talk to yourself—creates your reality.

When you focus on complaints and what’s wrong, you stay stuck. But if you shift your focus to possibilities and solutions, that’s where change begins.”

The Trap of Complaining

“Let’s talk about complaining for a minute,” I continue. “It feels good in the moment, doesn’t it? Like letting steam out of a pressure cooker. But here’s the problem: complaining keeps you chained to the negative. It’s like planting weeds in your garden and wondering why nothing beautiful grows.”

You nod slowly, stirring your tea. “I do complain a lot,” you admit. “But it’s hard not to when things feel so overwhelming.”

“I get it,” I say gently. “Life throws curveballs, and sometimes it feels like a storm that never ends. But here’s the question you need to ask yourself: Would you rather complain, or would you rather make a change? You can’t have both.”

The Power of Awareness

“So where do I start?” you ask, leaning forward.

“The first step is awareness,” I say. “You have to tune in to your thoughts. Pay attention to what’s occupying your mind. Are you dwelling on problems, or are you thinking about solutions? Awareness is like turning on the lights in a dark room. You can’t clean up the mess if you don’t see it.”

“That makes sense,” you say. “But how do I figure out why I’m thinking what I’m thinking?”

“Good question,” I say with a smile. “Let me share what helped me to tune in and start making changes.”

Three Steps to Tune In and Make a Change

Step 1: Listen Without Judgment

“First, you have to listen to your thoughts without judging them.

Imagine you’re a curious scientist studying your own mind. Carry a small notebook or use a note app on your phone, and jot down the recurring thoughts you notice throughout the day.

Don’t try to fix them yet; just observe.”

“Even the negative ones?” you ask.

“Especially the negative ones,” I say. “Those are the ones that hold clues about what’s really bothering you.”

Step 2: Ask Why

“Once you’ve identified a thought, ask yourself why it’s there.

Let’s say you keep thinking, ‘I’ll never be good enough.’

Ask yourself: Where does that belief come from? Did someone plant that seed in your mind years ago? Is it based on facts, or is it just a story you’ve been telling yourself?

“The goal is to uncover the root of the thought. When you understand where it comes from, you can decide whether it’s serving you or holding you back.”

Step 3: Choose Your Focus

“Here’s the fun part,” I say, leaning in. “You get to choose what you focus on.

Think of your mind like a radio dial. If you’re tuned into the 66.6 am station ‘Complain and Despair’, switch the dial to 101.1 ‘Hope and Solutions.’

What do you want to create in your life? What small step can you take today to move in that direction?”

“Small steps,” you repeat. “That feels doable.”

“Exactly,” I say. “Change doesn’t happen overnight, but every positive thought, every small action, plants seeds of transformation. And before you know it, your garden starts to bloom.”

The Power of Choice

“Let me tell you something,” I say, looking you in the eye. “You are more powerful than you realize.

The moment you decide to take control of your thoughts, you reclaim your power. It’s not about being perfect or never feeling negative.

It’s about making a choice—over and over again—to focus on what lifts you up rather than what drags you down.”

You sit back, a small smile playing on your lips. “So it really is all in my head, isn’t it?”

“It is,” I say, “but that’s the best news of all. Because if it’s in your head, it means you have the power to change it. And that, my dear, is where your strength lies.”

Moving Forward

As we finish our tea, you seem lighter, as if a tiny spark of hope has been ignited. Change might not be easy, but it’s possible.

And it starts with a simple decision: to tune in, to listen, and to choose.

So, what will you choose today?

Judy and I have published a new book which can help you change the way you think about yourself, called “Belief Blossoms”.

Click here to grab your free copy.

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Knowledge vs Information

Judy Johnston 08/28/2024 08/29/2024

People are curious creatures. We want to know stuff. The quest to know something is so great, that search engines are one of the most valued commodities in the world today.

The Google Search engine has 22,083,870,968 queries per day, that is 255,600 per second. That is a lot of queries. What are people searching for? What are we seeking?

We are bombarded with information. There are so many venues that provide constant information today, that it takes a conscious effort to reduce our consumption, or to cut ourselves off completely. Cellphones, computers, podcasts, streaming services, social media, television, radio are competing for our attention. At the present time, I cannot open my phone without seeing ads. This is before I put my password into my cellphone. A bit frustrating, yes.

Not long ago the daily news was delivered via a newspaper, or by radio or on the television twice a day. The 6 o’clock news or the 10 or 11 o’clock news. I remember sitting with my Dad as he drank his coffee with cream watching the Evening News. The news then was curated from journalists. At one time, I considered a career in journalism. My Dad would say things like “Don’t take the news too seriously, there are more important things in life.”.

Today much of which we are receiving is an opinion. It is a based on someone’s interpretation of fact. What if their interpretation is flawed? TicTok, X, Instagram, and Facebook show quick bits meant to invoke emotional response. There may be entertainment value, if a cute cat picture makes one smile. There may even be pause for thought. Our Wounded Women Rising Facebook and Instagram accounts have daily inspirational quotes or thoughts and photos to help promote a positive life experience.

As the volume of information increases, does a person’s knowledge expand?

When one learns something new, for example a new skill, or a new way of thinking; the new information is wired in, by the repetition. Have you ever driven a standard automobile? You can receive the information on how to use the clutch and the stick, the gas and brake pedals, but until you can stop on a hill, without rolling back, you don’t know how to drive a standard. At the point when you will have mastered the sweet spot, then you know how to drive a standard. You have confidence in your ability to drive. That confidence empowers you to get on the highway and go to new places and have new experiences. The confidence in your ability is what drives you.

What is knowledge?

My mentor Zoran Hochstatter says of PureBioenergy Healing Therapy the knowledge comes from the doing. In his book, 3 Chairs he states, “With the knowledge comes an enormous responsibility. The knowledge grows with practice and the joy of learning, and this leads to more personal growth.”

The information that we are subjected to on a daily basis can be a big distraction from seeking wisdom. How often to you find yourself doom scrolling? Just mindlessly scrolling through FB or Instagram and how do you feel afterwards? Time slipped by and what have we gained from it.

“Knowledge is not power. Knowledge is potential power. .Knowledge is trumped every day by execution.” says Tony Robbins

Henry W. Wright writes: “The beginning of all wisdom begins with knowledge. You cannot have wisdom unless you first have knowledge. You cannot have wisdom if you do not preface it with knowledge. Knowledge apart from wisdom is foolishness.” From the book,” A More Excellent Way”.

Knowledge is a gift to us, but we must ask for it and seek it. And upon receiving it, use it. Psalm 119.66 NLT “For wisdom will enter your heart, and knowledge will fill you with joy.”

As we go along in this life, may we gain in knowledge. Let’s share what we learned and remember to treat each other with respect and kindness. When the opportunity presents itself, walk in nature. Find the quiet and ask God to give you what you seek. I believe that God will give us both peace and the answers that we are seeking. “Ask and it will be given to you, seek, and you will find; knock and it will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives, and he who seeks finds, and to him who knocks it will be opened. Matthew7.7-8. The Old and the New Testament are filled with verses on knowledge, wisdom and peace. It’s worth a query.

Handling Life

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The Sweet Smell of Success

Judy Johnston 03/24/2024 03/24/2024

How do you spell Success? How do you define success? Each of us has our own definition of success. Our view of success comes from what we value. What we value comes from our belief patterns.

Today I want to share a few success stories from the women in our group.

One of the values that each of these women share is tenacity or resilience. The ability to bounce back from disasters, disappointment, divorce, and the despair that often cloaks those hard events in our life. These ladies made a decision that was right for them. It took courage. It took listening to their own counsel, as often other people told them it couldn’t be done. It took prayer and faith that the outcome would be good.

These women made bold decisions, and with perseverance achieved their desires. Sometimes in life, we don’t realize the talents, abilities or skills we possess until we are put to the test. If we stay in the same position, and don’t stretch ourselves, our physical muscles will atrophy. If we don’t expand beyond our current thoughts, how can we grow? If we don’t try, we will die.

All new experiences, take an effort. How many times have you had a thought, or desire, and squashed it before it had time to germinate. It is in our nature to protect ourselves from perceived danger. However, often the perceived danger is an illusion. It is a culmination of tangled emotion, fears, generational mores of “this is the way something is done”. Don’t rock the boat, or cause a fuss, and heavens above, don’t bring attention to yourself.

If you are told, sit down and be quiet repeatedly, eventually you comply. One acquiesces, however the desire to express the goal, desire, dream, does not go away. It festers. It may be stagnant for many years or decades. The dream may lie dormant, until you give it the time, attention, diligence, and yes love, that both you and the dream need to bloom.

Yet, as these women and many others have shown us, when the opportunity arises take the leap. Better yet when, in confidence, you decide you will live differently, doing that which your heart desires and create the opportunity by your new way of thinking. Success, joy, excitement, and a life well-lived awaits. I am excited to share with you these lovely ladies and their heart felt success stories.

My friend, Lori who has a philosophy of lifelong learning, and a strong desire to be of service made the decision at age 60 to go to university and get her law degree. Lori will graduate this April as she is called to the bar. It has been a tough three years of study. Some of the biggest hurdles she overcame had to due with finding housing in different cities. She studied in Toronto, London and in Windsor. She did love interacting with the young students who were her classmates. They too loved being with her, as they experienced the love and wisdom, she brought to all their group assignments. Lori has her teaching degree, and taught and administered in a private school, which she and her ex-husband had started. She taught in the public school system. She is a licensed wedding officiant, a pastor, and has her real estate license.

Yes, I admire and am often in awe of her energy, her joie de vie, her incredible faith, and her unwavering friendship. This September she will be competing in a body building competition. Lori has overcome life experiences that could have been crippling. Instead, she chooses to draw strength from adversity. She is strong in body, mind and spirit. Several years ago, she read and was inspired by Heather McCallion’s book,” Hurricane Hazel, A Life with Purpose”. Heather McCallion lived to age 101, and was the longest serving mayor of Mississauga, Ontario.

Lori often asks me, “What do you want to do with the next 30 years of your life?” “Have you uncovered your purpose?” Lori motivates me to higher expectations then what I would hold for myself. I am so grateful for that.

Our next woman holds her dedication to her family as her north star. She is devoted to her children and grandchildren. Her artist ability colours all aspects of her life. She is loyal, indefatigable, and generous. Her dream to own her home has been a part of her for as long as I can remember. As children she would arrange and re-arrange the furniture in our room. She painted a beautiful mural on the bedroom wall. Her desire to have her own space, where she could be her authentic, artistic, kind, glorious self has been in her conversation forever.

I don’t know that my sister, Jane even realizes how inspirational, self motivated and passionate she is. She always finds a way. She has sewn cushions for the chairs she stripped, sanded and varnished. She is an innovator. If something needs to be done, she will find a way to do it.

These past few years she has renovated a trailer, learning new skills like metal turning. She was one of the first girls to take shop class in high school and won the Industrial Arts award for her projects. She also chose to pursue a new education and career after age 50. Last year Jane made the leap to purchase her own condo. Of course, it is getting the Designed by Jane treatment. She has created a sanctuary for herself and her grandchildren to thrive there. Her dream is coming to fruition, as she and her environment blooms. I am so excited for her. Her sense of humour and dogged determination help her overcome the many obstacles she has encountered. Her “Yes, I can” attitude is infectious. She brings optimism, light, and enthusiasm to all she encounters.

Many of us has been through trials and tribulations, this woman has had more than her share.

SevaRam discovered her spiritual path and her spiritual gift as she was searching for ways to deal with post-partum depression. SevaRam is an inspirational leader. She teaches meditation, and the importance of stilling the mind to calm the body. She started a group for heart led women entrepreneurs called HeartSpace CoLab so we can share our experiences, our tech finds, our wins and our struggles and learn how to be an online presence.

She encourages all to persevere even when the road is rough. She shares her vulnerability. Her courses and offerings are very well-received. She practices what she preaches. Her passion for helping others shines through in all she does. She is a pioneer in what she is doing. A thought leader, who is led by her heart. She is proof, success is what you make it.

I salute these women who have all defined their version of success. How sweet it is.

How sweet they are, as they and their dreams bloom, infusing joy and the brightening the lives of all they encounter.

What dream will you fertilize today, so it will bloom in your future? Your success awaits.

Handling Life

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Courage

Judy Johnston 03/17/2024 03/17/2024

Courage what does that word mean to you?

We live in world which holds images of super heroes in high regard. Science fiction stories or movies with, lots of illustrations of women welding their swords in the air, ready to smite injustice, and stand for righteousness sell out with each new offering. Wonder Woman, Storm, Black Widow, Scarlet Witch, Laura Kroft are instantly recognizable. Why is it that the concept of super woman is appealing? In fact, it has become part of our vernacular: “Being a super-Mom”, “What is your super power?”

Is this superwoman concept something to which we wish to aspire? These are fictional characters.

They are portrayed with principles or values that may be appealing to us, however.

Strength, loyalty, integrity and courage are values we can strive to incorporate in our lives.

Courage is the capacity to persist despite the fear, suffering, pain or failure. A courageous person may feel fear; however, they choose to do the thing anyways. Courage can also be the capacity to think, act or be different than the norm. In other blogs we have acknowledged that throughout history, the norm has not been the best way. It is okay to think for yourself. To base your decisions on your own experience and contemplate your actions with faith and discernment takes courage.

If you feel you lack courage, there are ways to exercise it and increase it in your daily life. You may want to encourage your internal lion.

Stretch out of your comfort zone – make one small decision or action towards that which you wish to achieve. Open your mind so that you are at least able to consider a different way of doing something. It may be as simple as taking a new way home or as complex as considering a course to lead to a new career. Be open.

You could choose to have the courage to speak to people about topics that may not be popular. If things need to be changed to improve life, your life and others you care about. It may take a good bit of courage to have those discussions.

Courage to forgive the past, so you can live in the present without the heartache, bitterness or anger , regret or shame. You are not the same person you were then, that person is gone, so let her go.

Every choice we make may not be the best choice. That’s ok. Have the courage to choose and if you realize an error or find a better way, then redirect, reset your direction, and have the courage to admit your mistake. We all make mistakes. We fall, we fail, we get back up {and look around to see if anyone saw us tumble}, we begin again but not from the start.

You have collected experience and wisdom along the way. The courage to recognize that not all change can be seen immediately. It takes courage to persevere, to keep going especially when things get tough. So often when we don’t get immediate returns on our efforts, we give up. You may try something once, and state that it didn’t work. Any new habit, or lifestyle change takes on average 3 months to take effect and see the results. The results are happening, you just don’t see them yet. Stick with it. Remember life often looks darkest before the dawn. Share with Rose and I what you would like to be courageous in, we will encourage you. Lions stay with their pride and the lioness can be the most courageous in leading her family.

Here’s a wee poem to inspire you to let your inner lion out.

Courage

Courage to say no

Courage to let go

Courage to believe

Courage to succeed

Courage to unwind

Courage to un whine /wine

Courage to address

That which makes us best

Courage to Love with

Unfettered heart

Knowing , having faith

You can always restart.

Handling Life

Featured

Spring Renewal and Regrowth

Judy Johnston 03/08/2024 03/08/2024

Spring – the words itself invokes visions of light, green growth, shoots of flowers, and plants

peaking up out of the dark earth. The scent of fresh air, and damp soil. The melodious song of so many different kinds of birds filling the morning with their cacophony of joy.

The warmth of the sun’s rays beckoning us to come outside, shed your jackets, coats, sweaters and boots. Feel the warm of the sun and a gentle breeze caress your face.

Leave your worries to embrace this new day. This new opportunity for growth, renewal and fresh, creative ideas. This time for play. For within play is afforded the space for creativity.

Spending time with children allows us to view the world with their eyes of innocent and wonder. They don’t concern themselves with the latest election polls, the cost of things or whatever the latest media disaster or distraction is. They are simply joyful in the moment.

Walk with a child in the woods, or a beach or in a backyard and discover how they act? What bugs attract them, ladybug or beetles? What sounds do they pay attention to? What thoughts do they share with you? Listen, and explore this world which holds a natural rhythm that is for our benefit.

Walk with yourself or a friend and let your inner child be refreshed, cherished and listened to. Yes, give yourself permission to be goofy. To jump in those puddles, to stoop to smell the crocuses, snowdrops, and the glorious scent of the hyacinths in bloom. This is our season of renewal. What would you like to renew? What would you like to bring new life to?

A forgotten friendship? A passion for painting or photography? A spiritual journey? Perhaps you want to teach a skill, or learn a new skill? What would the kid in you like to do? Is this the year you join a softball team?

We can plant seeds in this the springtime of our life. We can expect new growth and have expectations of harvesting future bounty. That is called hope. Hope Springs Eternal.

It is not a coincidence that after a winter of isolation, hibernation and Netflix that we crave a new experience. Spring and the increase of sunlight in this hemisphere does create a quickening of the blood, a desire for something new, a spring fling mentality. Go outside. Get some sunshine. Breathe that fresh clean ionized air. Allow a renewal of your state of mind and spirit. The season is changing. You can choose to change with it.

As you put away your boots, and bring out your sandals – can you permit yourself to walk lighter? Can you put away some of the worries that hold you down? Most of the things we worry about, never come to pass. Release them and renew our minds with light and loving thoughts. Let that child-like sense of wonder stay with us. Foster it. Fertilizer the acts of kindness that make our hearts sing like those birds in the morning.

Listen to your inner wisdom, asking the Holy Spirit to guide your thoughts. What new adventure awaits today? Who can I call and share this happiness of the season with?

What good trouble can I get into? Where are those puddles?

Wishing you a joy filled, adventurous, bouncy Spring.

Blog Posts Handling Life

Featured

The Summit

Judy Johnston 03/03/2024 03/03/2024

As you go along through life’s busy hours,

Pause now and then just smell the flowers.

If the road gets rough, or the climb gets steep.

Pause and rest a while, perhaps take a wee sleep.

Don’t stop too long. Do seize the day

For good things will come along the way.

Don’t tarry, or think there’s not good to be found

The good is out there, just look around.

For in moving forward, the scenery changes,

The next opportunity may be o’er those mountain ranges.

Your experience you will always pack along side you.

The courage to move upward, will take you to the next view.

For on this road of life, remember it is true:

Love lifts you up and God will provide.

But only you can git up off your hide.

You got it in you. Don’t doubt your ability.

Gather your friends and show off your mobility.

You may have to walk, drag your ass through the mud,

You may scrape your knees, just wipe off the blood.

Keep going my friend. The summit is worth it.

The climb makes the conquer of trials so sweet.

When you look from the top, down that trail that you beat,

The boulders, the briars, the swamp, and the heat.

Rejoice, sing out loud, bang your drum, do a dance

You did it! Kept faith, and look you are thriving!

Now hold out your hand to the next girl in line,

To reassure her that all will be fine.

Emotions Handling Life

Featured

Death : End or Beginning?

Judy Johnston 02/08/2024 02/08/2024

In the last week of January, Rose’s mother passed into glory, my father-in-law passed away, and Sue’s Dad went to be with the Lord. And, a dear friend of ours passed suddenly and unexpectedly. A great understanding of death has occurred. Our version of what death is, is attributed to our perception of what life is. If you hold the belief of life after death, if you believe you are a spirit in a body, and that the spirit is connected to God eternally, death loses it sting. Death is not the end. It is the spirit’s return from where it came. It is the circle completed.

If one does not have a belief beyond the life of the body, there is nothing else. Death of a loved one can be such an empty, lonely, pit of despair. I am witnessing how when one has no belief in the afterlife, in heaven, or in God, how painful the death of a beloved can be.

Faith soothes the hurt. Yes, of course, we are sad that our loved ones have gone from the earth. Yes, we will miss them. The comfort of knowing that to be absent from the body is to be present with the Lord, is exactly that, comfort. This is what I hold onto in times of grief. It strengthens me when I am weak.

Let’s be clear, I still experience all the emotions. Anger certainly reared its head over the past few weeks. The song lyrics,” Get your house in order for the coming of the Lord”, keep repeating in my head. Sadness, compassion and empathy have also visited. Joy too, as we remembered the fun that was shared over the years.

There is a responsibility that each of us has to the ones remaining on earth after our passing.

First, I believe it is important that the people you love, know you love them. Speak IT. Tell them.

While you are alive. Don’t wait. Why make someone wait for something so important to their mental and emotion wellbeing? It benefits us all to know that we are loved and lovable. Three simple words “I love you” while looking in their eyes, make a world of difference to the one receiving and increases the love in the one giving.

Speak clearly to your loved ones. Let them know how important they are to your life. Let them know you are proud of them. Write a note if you cannot speak the words. You show love through actions. That means, follow through with your words. My father-in-law would bring home made food to us often. That was his love language. He wanted us to sit , eat and have a drink with him, to enjoy life.

Do the work so your financial affairs are set up properly and accurately. The frustration, stress, and time required to chase down essential forms, and sort through a mess of paperwork is an unnecessary burden for those left grieving. Wills, Power of Attorney, both for Property and Personal Care are essential legal documents. Make sure they are current and up to date. and the people who are appointed can perform all the duties the job of Estate Executor requires.

Have your bank accounts, investment accounts, and debts and assets in a file, easily accessible. When I was a Life Insurance and Financial Advisor, CLU., I would give clients a thick binder with plastic insert pages which would hold their policies and important documents. It made the transition process streamline for the family. All vital documents in one place.

There are a great number of government forms to be completed upon death. The funeral home director or consultant does help with Canadian Pension death benefit, and some other government forms. A lawyer will help to advise on the execution of the Will. The executor does the work to find the assets, liabilities, properties, get assessments of valuables, and so on.

A good life insurance agent will assist you in completing policy claims forms and following up with the carrier. Remember to look for other death benefits, pension death benefits, some credit cards have life insurance portions on them. If death was a result of a car accident, car insurance claims forms need to be completed.

The final income taxes must be filed. The estate may be subject to probate which is another tax. It can take a year or more before an estate is probated and able to be dispersed.

The stress of deadlines to submit claims, forms and taxes, penalties for late submission, and bank tellers who are uncooperative simply add more grief to a person who just wants to remember their Dad, Mom, or beloved. In all of this lots of emotion may surface; some may surprise you.

There are many and varied rituals around death. These come from our beliefs, our culture, and the accepted practice in your community. A funeral mass, prayer service, visitation at the funeral home, a wake, a Celebration of Life are for the family and friends as much as for the deceased. Some Indigenous tribes in Canada offer tobacco or other plant medicines to ease the transfer to the spirit world. In the Hindu culture the spirit is reborn on earth. Filipino and Chinese and Jamaican customs hold the 9^th day ceremony when the spirit goes to into the spirit world. In Mexico death is so integrated with life, many festivals revolve around the ancestors who have gone before into the afterlife. There are so many traditions and rituals I cannot name them all here. The line that connects us is that the Spirit is acknowledged, honoured and celebrated. Today many people are choosing their own method of acknowledging a life and grieving a loss of life.

My friend, Robin’s Celebration of Life was the most loving, joyful, kind, peaceful and inspiring event I have attended, ever. Robin touched so many lives with his loving kindness, and spirit of joy, and humour. Robin was a healer who lived to inspire us to be our best, most humble selves. Friends and relations at his Celebration, sang songs written for him and his young daughter, they played guitars, read poems, shared stories, and yes, we danced, as Robin loved to dance. We even had a laughing Budda yoga moment. Yes, there were a few tears, tears are healing too. We hugged one another and felt the love that was very present in that room. I believed we all left feeling connected to each other and inspired to do more good works with our time here on earth. Thank you to Robin’s family for giving us this opportunity. It, like Robin, made an impact on our lives.

In the weeks and months that follow the death of a loved one, it is important to be aware of your own well being. Forgive the mistakes, yours and theirs. Don’t harbour bitterness, it hurts you on a cellular level. It takes time to do this kind of healing. Grief wears many faces. Be conscious of what you are feeling. Acknowledge it. This past week an immense fatigue has come upon my husband and I. Rose too is exhausted as she has been balancing her Mom’s illness, and her own responsibilities. We have been dealing with hospitals, caring for the other family members, managing all the necessary pieces required to keep the physical, emotional and financial wheels on the cart for everyone. This juggling has been going on for a long time. We are tired. We are not sure what the future will hold but I do believe through it all God holds us.

Vati, we love you and will miss you. Mom, Rose knows you are with God, she is grateful for all you taught her. Sue, you know how your Daddy shaped so many lives with his life’s mission, yours included. Robin we will remember you in the dance.

Love heals all. God is love and anyone who lives in love lives in God, and God lives in him. 1 John 16

Handling Life

Featured

Coping With Chaos: A Guide for Wounded Women

Rose 01/24/2024 02/05/2024

How many times in the past few years have you wished you could unplug from the chaos surrounding you?

I remember thinking that I just wanted to get off the merry-go-round. I could not get a grip, a hold on anything. And I doubted everything.

When my wasband was having an affair, I knew it deep in my soul. Even though I knew it, I could not prove it. With no proof, I convinced myself that I was imagining it. But there was that niggling deep down that something was very wrong.

The thoughts that spun around in my mind were chaotic. I suffered. I suffered because I did not know what to believe, including myself. The questions assaulted me day and night. The how’s, the who’s, the what’s, the why’s. Even the question of “What did I do to cause this?”

The chaos leaked over from my mind into my life. At one point I felt completely immobilized. Then, the proof began to rise to the surface. I felt vindicated by the proof, but it did not quiet the chaos. A whole new onslaught of “stinking thinking” took over. I wanted off the merry-go-round and I wanted off NOW!

Chaos refers to a state of disorder, confusion, or unpredictability. It manifests in various forms, disrupting your sense of order and the stability that we look for.

For wounded women, emotional chaos is a prevalent aspect of our lives. This impact of trauma leads to a wide range of intense feelings such as fear, anxiety, anger, and deep sadness. These emotions can surface unexpectedly, contributing to our sense of internal turmoil.

Chaos can be triggered by unexpected events or reminders of past trauma. The unpredictable nature of these triggers adds an element of instability, making it challenging for you to predict and manage your emotional responses.

Chaos extends to all our relationships, with trust issues, difficulties in forming connections, and challenges in keeping healthy boundaries. The aftermath of trauma can affect the way wounded women engage with others, leading to interpersonal struggles and a sense of uncertainty in our social circles.

Wounded women grapple with the unknown, fearing what might come next. We have spent a lot of time trying to control the daily events of our lives, always predicting the worst-case scenario and planning what we would do when the bomb exploded. This uncertainty can further contribute to a sense of chaos in our lives, even when we are removed from the cause of our trauma. Do you feel unable to anticipate or control the challenges ahead?

Trauma shakes the foundations of our identity, leading to a profound loss of self. As wounded women we experience the sense of disconnection from who we once were, contributing to a state of existential chaos as we question our purpose, our values, and our place in the world.

Chaos is often cyclical, with one challenge leading to another. We may find ourselves caught in a loop of difficulties, each compounding the other. Breaking this cycle becomes crucial for restoring a sense of order and control.

Understanding the multifaceted nature of chaos is a crucial step in addressing and navigating the impact on our lives. By acknowledging and dissecting the different dimensions of chaos, we can begin to develop strategies for coping, healing, and reclaiming a sense of stability and purpose.

Within the chaos, there is the potential for healing and growth. The journey towards recovery involves navigating the complexities of trauma, facing challenges, and transforming pain into resilience. This dual nature highlights the absurd coexistence of chaos and potential renewal.

Acknowledging and harnessing this potential can empower you on your journey toward recovery. Let’s explore the ways which healing and growth can emerge amid chaos.

Imagine if you could build resilience as the cornerstone of your healing.

Chaos often unveils the natural resilience and strength within individuals. In navigating the complexities of our experiences, we discover an inner determination that allows us to face adversity head-on. This resilience becomes a cornerstone for our healing.

Each challenge inside the chaos offers us an opportunity to learn and grow. As we face difficulties we get new insights, skills, and perspectives. These lessons contribute to our personal development and resilience.

Think of a time when you said no when you usually would have said yes or maybe would have said nothing at all. These times showed you that the world did not fall apart when you took control of your thoughts, values and notions and stood up for yourself. This recognition shows you that you are strong.

How many times did you keep getting up and keep going, after hardship and misfortune? This shows that you are resilient.

The chaos following trauma prompts a deep exploration of our identity. Through introspection and self-discovery, we have the opportunity to redefine who we are. We get to shed old stories and embrace a more authentic sense of who we are. This process is fundamental to the healing journey.

The chaos of trauma often prompts existential questions. When we seek meaning and purpose, we embark on a journey of profound self-reflection. This quest for significance contributes to a sense of direction and clarity, fostering a deeper understanding of our life’s purpose.

Overcoming chaos nurtures a sense of empowerment. As we navigate and conquer challenges, we gain a newfound belief in our ability to overcome adversity. This empowerment becomes a catalyst for further growth.

Nothing causes the development of coping mechanisms more than chaos. In our quest for stability, we often discover healthy coping strategies. Strategies such as a mindfulness practice, creative outlets, or therapeutic interventions. These tools become essential for managing the impact of chaos.

Chaos tends to pull us into the hullabaloo of past traumas or anxieties about an uncertain future. Through mindfulness practices, wounded women can cultivate an awareness of the present moment. The benefit of mindfulness is the reduction of overwhelming emotions and the fostering of a sense of calm amid the chaos.

Healing is often helped through connections with others who understand and empathize. As wounded women we can find solace in support networks— with fellow survivors, friends, and family. Building and nurturing these connections becomes a source of emotional sustenance and shared strength.

Seeking professional help, with a focus on your outcome rather than a reminder of your past, can be a transformative step toward healing. Therapists provide guidance, tools, and a safe space for processing trauma, fostering growth, and facilitating the integration of coping mechanisms.

Chaos often involves significant change. Embracing change as a catalyst for personal transformation allows women to reshape their stories. This adaptability becomes a powerful force for positive change.

The potential for healing and growth during chaos lies in the resilience, self-discovery, empowerment, and connections that emerge through the journey of overcoming trauma. By recognizing and nurturing these aspects, wounded women can navigate the complexities of their experiences and move towards a future marked by strength, purpose, and renewed well-being. We believe that when a woman heals, the world is healed, one woman at a time.