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The Sweet Smell of Success

How do you spell Success? How do you define success?  Each of us has our own definition of success.  Our view of success comes from what we value. What we value comes from our belief patterns.

Today I want to share a few success stories from the women in our group.

One of the values that each of these women share is tenacity or resilience. The ability to bounce back from disasters, disappointment, divorce, and the despair that often cloaks those hard events in our life.  These ladies made a decision that was right for them. It took courage.  It took listening to their own counsel, as often other people told them it couldn’t be done. It took prayer and faith that the outcome would be good.

These women made bold decisions, and with perseverance achieved their desires. Sometimes in life, we don’t realize the talents, abilities or skills we possess until we are put to the test.  If we stay in the same position, and don’t stretch ourselves, our physical muscles will atrophy.  If we don’t expand beyond our current thoughts, how can we grow? If we don’t try, we will die.  

All new experiences, take an effort.  How many times have you had a thought, or desire, and squashed it before it had time to germinate.  It is in our nature to protect ourselves from perceived danger.  However, often the perceived danger is an illusion. It is a culmination of tangled emotion, fears, generational mores of “this is the way something is done”. Don’t rock the boat, or cause a fuss, and heavens above, don’t bring attention to yourself.  

If you are told, sit down and be quiet repeatedly, eventually you comply. One acquiesces, however the desire to express the goal, desire, dream, does not go away.  It festers. It may be stagnant for many years or decades. The dream may lie dormant, until you give it the time, attention, diligence, and yes love, that both you and the dream need to bloom. 

Yet, as these women and many others have shown us, when the opportunity arises take the leap. Better yet when, in confidence, you decide you will live differently, doing that which your heart desires and create the opportunity by your new way of thinking.  Success, joy, excitement, and a life well-lived awaits.  I am excited to share with you these lovely ladies and their heart felt success stories.

My friend, Lori who has a philosophy of lifelong learning, and a strong desire to be of service made the decision at age 60 to go to university and get her law degree.  Lori will graduate this April as she is called to the bar.  It has been a tough three years of study. Some of the biggest hurdles she overcame had to due with finding housing in different cities. She studied in Toronto, London and in Windsor.  She did love interacting with the young students who were her classmates.  They too loved being with her, as they experienced the love and wisdom, she brought to all their group assignments.  Lori has her teaching degree, and taught and administered in a private school, which she and her ex-husband had started.  She taught in the public school system. She is a licensed wedding officiant, a pastor, and has her real estate license.  

Yes, I admire and am often in awe of her energy, her joie de vie, her incredible faith, and her unwavering friendship.   This September she will be competing in a body building competition.  Lori has overcome life experiences that could have been crippling. Instead, she chooses to draw strength from adversity.  She is strong in body, mind and spirit.  Several years ago, she read and was inspired by Heather McCallion’s book,” Hurricane Hazel, A Life with Purpose”. Heather McCallion lived to age 101, and was the longest serving mayor of Mississauga, Ontario.

Lori often asks me, “What do you want to do with the next 30 years of your life?” “Have you uncovered your purpose?”  Lori motivates me to higher expectations then what I would hold for myself.  I am so grateful for that.  

Our next woman holds her dedication to her family as her north star.  She is devoted to her children and grandchildren. Her artist ability colours all aspects of her life. She is loyal, indefatigable, and generous.  Her dream to own her home has been a part of her for as long as I can remember.  As children she would arrange and re-arrange the furniture in our room. She painted a beautiful mural on the bedroom wall. Her desire to have her own space, where she could be her authentic, artistic, kind, glorious self has been in her conversation forever. 

I don’t know that my sister, Jane even realizes how inspirational, self motivated and passionate she is.  She always finds a way. She has sewn cushions for the chairs she stripped, sanded and varnished. She is an innovator. If something needs to be done, she will find a way to do it.

These past few years she has renovated a trailer, learning new skills like metal turning.  She was one of the first girls to take shop class in high school and won the Industrial Arts award for her projects.  She also chose to pursue a new education and career after age 50.  Last year Jane made the leap to purchase her own condo. Of course, it is getting the Designed by Jane treatment. She has created a sanctuary for herself and her grandchildren to thrive there.  Her dream is coming to fruition, as she and her environment blooms.  I am so excited for her.  Her sense of humour and dogged determination help her overcome the many obstacles she has encountered.  Her “Yes, I can” attitude is infectious.  She brings optimism, light, and enthusiasm to all she encounters.

Many of us has been through trials and tribulations, this woman has had more than her share. 

SevaRam discovered her spiritual path and her spiritual gift as she was searching for ways to deal with post-partum depression.  SevaRam is an inspirational leader.  She teaches meditation, and the importance of stilling the mind to calm the body. She started a group for heart led women entrepreneurs called HeartSpace CoLab so we can share our experiences, our tech finds, our wins and our struggles and learn how to be an online presence. 

She encourages all to persevere even when the road is rough.  She shares her vulnerability.  Her courses and offerings are very well-received. She practices what she preaches.  Her passion for helping others shines through in all she does.  She is a pioneer in what she is doing. A thought leader, who is led by her heart.  She is proof, success is what you make it.

I salute these women who have all defined their version of success.  How sweet it is.

How sweet they are, as they and their dreams bloom, infusing joy and the brightening the lives of all they encounter. 

What dream will you fertilize today, so it will bloom in your future? Your success awaits.

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Watch What You Think

Why do we think the way we think? 

What has informed us? One element of being human is that we are consistently seeking new information.  We think that is knowledge.  The news, social media, libraries, the education systems all exist because of our desire to know.  Curiosity is a good thing.

Well, maybe not for cats.

Do we believe things just because we are told that those things are true? How many things throughout history that have been believed to be true are false?  They are so far from being true that in some ways we cannot fathom that people believed them.  For centuries, it was believed that women were less intelligent than men. It was believed that certain cultures or races were less intelligent than the race in power at the time.  It was believed that the earth was the centre of the universe.   These were presented as facts.  Yet these presumed facts are as far from the truth as can be.

History shows us that just thinking something is so, does not make it so.  

You have heard it said that your thoughts create your actions, your actions create your habits, and your habits create your life.   What are those thoughts that are creating your actions?  What is the recording that is playing in the background of our mind?  Where did those thoughts come from?  Are those thoughts true?

 It is worthwhile to examine those thoughts which we hold to be true. Joe Dispenza says to mediate is to become familiar with.  Are we even familiar with the thoughts that percolate though our mind?   As a mother, how often have we said to our children, usually when trying to correct behavior; “Now you sit there, and think about it”. Think about what? Without giving them guidance on how to address an issue or solve a problem, or change their perceived correct response, how can they be expected to think any differently?   Is this not true for ourselves?

In the book, A Course in Miracles, it states in one of the 365  lessons  “All my thoughts are past thoughts”.   Unless we are willing to introduce or imagine a new way of thinking, we are destined to repeat the same thoughts. Fortunately, this book does teach ways of changing our thought patterns.

The mind, the body and the spirit are not separate.  They are intertwined by a constant, cascade of intelligent energy.   There has been much research on how the state of this synchronized and harmonious activity between the heart, brain, and other physiological systems affect the body.  When the heart and brain are in coherence, it can have profound effects on both physical and emotional well-being.  When the heart and the brain are in a state of coherence levels of stress hormones, such a cortisol decrease, and the levels of neurotransmitters like serotonin and dopamine increase.  In other words, I feel good. I can think clearly. I am calm. My mind is creative. I can solve problems.  My relationship with myself and others improves.

This wholeness of heart, mind and spirit is wellness.  This energy informs our cells. It is the energy of life.  To heal is to make whole.  There is no separation of heart, mind or spirit.

Therefore, the thoughts do influence our heart.  And our heart influences our thoughts.

Something to think about.

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Where Do Lies Come From?

We live in a world where ideas, thoughts, images, and concepts are continually presented to us. Media, institutions, social moirés, social groups, work environments, culture and family beliefs all influence our perception of self. In our current world, there are so many lies that are propagated, it can be difficult to ascertain the truth.

“There is no definition for a lie that serves to make it true. Nor can there be a truth that lies conceal effectively. “A Course In Miracles

In the tobacco industry, Phillip Morris marketed to consumers in the 1950s that their cigarettes were healthy. Whole product lines were created and sold based on the lie. When the FDA determined tobacco products caused illness, the company put filters on their products. The filters contained carcinogens including asbestos. Today tobacco companies market their products to the tune of $28 Billion of profit, as an individual choice by informed adults. Given the overwhelming evidence that tobacco products cause illness and even death, why would people believe the marketing?

To condition a response in an individual or in a group of people, repetition is key. Often our initial response is to say that is not true.   With enough repetition, coupled with pressure to conform from outside influences, doubt can begin to erode our internal compass. We go along to get along. This can be foolhardy and extremely dangerous.

Lies are often presented as a distorted truth. But we know truth is pure, unpolluted and without stain. Truth does no harm.

Where do lies come from? Lies are external influences that try to impact our internal alignment. Three questions to ask yourself when confronted with a lie.

Who is saying this?

What is their motivation?

Will I allow it to impact me?

Nellie McClung, a Women’s Institute Member and one of the women responsible for getting women a vote in Canada is quoted as saying “I want to leave something behind when I go. Some small legacy of truth: some word that will shine in a dark place.” Nellie knew that a lie that was being promoted. The lie was, “women are not smart enough, women are too fragile, women are too hysterical, and that nice women did not vote.” The lie needed to be dissolved when brought into the light of the truth. Thank you, Nellie for the strength of your commitment to the truth.

What lies are you believing that no longer serve your internal alignment?